This is a reprint of the second half of an article I published on witchvox in February 2011 http://www.witchvox.com/va/dt_va.html?a=&c=words&id=14414, but it still seems appropriate...
As a group pagans need to stop nitpicking each other; if another tradition has a different way of doing things that you disagree with on purely theological or personal grounds let it go. If it's not your group, why do you really care how they are doing things? If a group is engaging in dangerous, illegal, or manipulative practices thats a whole different issue, but differences in approach shouldn't matter. We waste way too much energy fighting over how other people do things, instead of looking for the common ground.
So I asked if pagan unity can be achieved, and I think the answer is yes, and no. Yes we can unite as a larger group if we find a way to put aside the differences that can be put aside, like letting go of the ideas that any one particular way is "the" way, or the tradition. As soon as people start saying that they are the "true" witches (heathens/druids/etc.,) they have set up a rigid dichotomy of us against them and if you aren't with them then you aren't "real" and therefore aren't legitimate, and that attitude has to go right from the start. I may not agree with someone, I may even hate everything about what they do and how they do it, but that doesn't make them less "real". Of course acknowledging that they are really pagan, or whatever they are identifying as, does not mean that anything they are saying is true or accurate. (There is also a deeper argument about people claiming to be part of initiatory traditions when they aren't - that isn't what I'm talking about here, I simply mean the broad labels like witch, or heathen or pagan that are largely matters of self-identification). The flip side of that coin, and this is where the "no" part of the asnwer comes in, is that some things can never be compromised and we as a community need to stop acting as if anyone calling themselves pagan is automatically a good person. People are people no matter what their faith and some pagans are good people and others are pretty crappy people, just like everyone else. It's okay for us to say, "no I won't be associated with that person" if the reason is legitimate and we have really looked at whether we can compromise on this, but that means that true complete unity will never be possible because there will always be people identifying as pagans who contribute nothing but dissention to the community. There are online "trolls" and there are real life ones, there are mentally unstable people, there are pedophiles and violent people, and there always will be and these are issues that the community will always have to contend with. Being pagan does not mean that all the bad in the world and in people just disappears, but we can acknowledge this fact and deal with it. So unity is a utopian idea, but building a strong ecumenical community isn't. That dream could be possible.
Building a larger community depends on putting aside the little things like personality conflict, pride, and mistrust of other traditions, and embracing the things we have in common. It means working together to build a larger sense of community, not to homogenize all the traditions into one; it's our diversity that makes us such an interesting group. Pagan community can be built and made strong, but not without real effort and soul searching from all of us - and that's why it remains a dream and not a reality.