The Story Behind Pagan Portals Fairy Witchcraft

Every book that's written has a story about the motivation behind it's writing, and this is the story behind Pagan Portals Fairy Witchcraft.

In 2013 I was on social media one day and I stumbled across a link on a page which purported to discuss 'Faerie Witchcraft'. Clicking on it showed a convoluted and confusing hodge-podge of paragraphs that wandered between nonsensical and silly - calling the mid-winter holiday 'Nollaig' for example, which literally means Christmas in Irish, but implying it was an older and genuinely pagan name for the holiday*. It took the common modern approach of treating the fairies as a kind of hybrid between elementals and nature spirits, shoe-horned into a tight corset, and then shoved into a pagan framework. Being rather feisty myself I went back to my own social media page and ranted a bit about kids these days staying off my lawn and bemoaned the growing trend of blending this view of fairies into a pagan framework.

And then I had one of those moments that will sometimes happen, where I sensed Themselves saying to me, 'If you don't like it, do something about it.' And I stopped, sort of mid-word as I was typing on facebook and I thought about that. Because venting to my friends whenever I ran across something that seemed so offbase to me was fine but ultimately it didn't accomplish very much. The mainstream perception was still what it was. And so I started to think about what I could really do about that and the idea of a book came to me. I had written one book at that point for Moon Books so I had an idea how the process worked but I was uncertain about writing anything about Themselves and also nervous about writing anything about my own personal style of witchcraft. It was one thing after all to write about my spirituality in a more general sense or to write about the theory of things and another entirely to write about how I actually did things myself.

Nonetheless the idea wouldn't go away and I kept feeling pushed to do it. I felt like it was something that the Good People wanted, as trite as that may sound, to have that option out there for people seeking to connect to them from a neopagan framework. There were a few things in print but they inevitably were separated from the root cultures in important ways**, usually through the addition to different degrees of ceremonial magic or Kabbalah. My own focus was on the Fairy Faith without that overlay, and with my pagan religion as a base instead of Catholicism. That made it something different from what I was seeing elsewhere, and that difference had its value.

So I decided to write the book as a Pagan Portal, a very basic introductory text. It would give people the idea of what was possible and a direction to go in if it interested them. It would put the option out there. I really struggled over calling it Fairy Witchcraft though, as I am not personally a fan of the 'f' word however I eventually acknowledged that to reach the people who were looking for it meant it needed a very clear and obvious name. So subtlety went out the window for the sake of a clear message. I rather think that amuses Them actually and I definitely felt like they were encouraging that name as well.

And as it turns out that voice telling me to 'do something about it' was right, or at least correct in that there was a need for it. Certainly people seem to find something meaningful in it and the Pagan Portal was followed up by a full length in depth book, with a third book coming out next year. In the end I am glad I listened, and glad I took that chance - and very glad Moon books took a chance on me.



*spoiler alert - Nollaig is from the Old Irish notlaic which in turn was borrowed from the Latin natalicia - 'birthday'
**I'm not judging that by the way, just saying that it takes the beliefs in a different direction from the folk beliefs of a hundred or two hundred years ago, which were more what I was working from. Obviously I add in neopagan influences to evolve things in a unique direction.

How I Became an Author

I was asked the other day to share the story of how I became an author, so today that's what I'm going to talk about.

I'll be the first person to admit I never thought this is what I'd be doing at this point in my life, although I can't say its entirely a shock either. When I was in high school I co-wrote an unfinished book with a friend and I was always writing poetry. But it's also true that writing and reading have never come easily for me and the idea of making a career of it wouldn't have been my first thought.

I am severely dyslexic as well as dyscalculaic; I didn't learn to read until I was in second grade, after years of special classes. It would be fair to say that my initial experience with the public school system was difficult and there were other bumps in the road as I went along. Once I did learn to read I very much enjoyed the ability to lose myself in other worlds and to learn from diverse sources, but writing, particularly spelling, never ceased to be a challenge. I don't know how to explain what its like to someone who isn't dyslexic but part of the challenge is that when I make an error no matter how many times I re-read the sentence or word I may not see the mistake. The only way I know to compensate for this issue is to proof read everything dozens of times (including books) and even then there will still be mistakes in them.

So perhaps you can see why if you'd asked me years ago if I thought I'd ever be an author I would have said no. Its not that I didn't think I could tell a good story or had anything valuable to say, but I am aware of the learning disability that I live with and how it effects my ability to communicate in writing.

Two things happened though which set me on the path of public writing. Firstly I was in a position where I was not writing everything by hand anymore (which I had done previously) and instead I was typing on a computer which offered spellcheck services that helped me greatly. Secondly I was a member of a Druid Order in the late 2000's which required dedicants to complete a project to become Druids. My project was to repaganize sections of the Carmina Gadelica, and my mentor for the project, Ellen Evert Hopman, suggested that the finished project would be valuable to put out as a book so that other people could also use it. I had never thought to do something like that before but self-publishing at that point in time made it feasible. And so I did it, realising a small book of repaganized prayers. I was so inspired by the project itself that I went on to do another selection from the same source this time aimed at charms as well as prayers; this was also released as a small book and then the two were combined into an omnibus edition.

I was emboldened by this writing success to begin a blog, this blog, as a resource for the community. I envisioned it as a place to share research I was doing and to offer good sources for people as well as just to share my thoughts on things. Its undergone different changes over the last 6 years, but I do hope that it has at least provided a resource for people, if nothing else.

In all honesty that probably would have been the end of it  - I had no further ambition beyond occasionally submitting poetry to magazines or anthologies - but shortly afterwards I was approached by small publisher through a friend because they were looking for someone to write a children's book on the Fairy Faith. It was my first publishing contract for a book. Not too long after that I had the idea, inspired by a book by Cat Treadwell, to use my blog material as the basis for a book. I put it all together and submitted it to a newer (at the time) imprint called Moon Books. Why Moon? Several reasons, including that I had friends who wrote for them at the time and that I liked the ease of their submission process online. My first full length non-fiction book came out of that, Where the Hawthorn Grows, which is a look at my thoughts on Druidism* and being a Druid in America. From there of course I have written other titles for Moon, and I found that I not only enjoyed writing but seemed to be good at it. I currently have seven books out with Moon, two more forthcoming in the next six months and three more under contract.

Once again though, it probably would have stayed with non-fiction if not for another friend and a conversation. I hadn't written fiction since high school but I had seen several friends on social media talking about doing National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo or NaNo) in November and I kept thinking it looked like fun. I am always coming up with stories in my head but I had never written any of them down, at least not since the 90's. But I was talking with my friend Catherine Kane in 2012 about a NaNo project she was doing that ended up as a published novel 'The Land that Lies Between'** and when I mentioned having some NaNo envy she strongly urged me to try participating just for fun. In 2013 I did give it a try and I quickly realized that I genuinely love writing fiction, specifically urban fantasy, and to my surprise what was supposed to be a project just for fun took on a life of its own. I had taken to posting little plot summaries and word counts on my social media as a motivator to hit my goal and 'win' NaNo and I had several people asking me when they could read the finished book. This led to a brief attempt to find an agent (lots of very polite responses saying they liked it but weren't interested) and then to submit to a trade publisher. I was offered a contract on the first book, but I decided to self publish because they wanted me to re-write something in the book which was intentionally being left a mystery and because I knew at that point it was meant to be at least a trilogy and I was afraid if it didn't sell well the other books wouldn't see print. I am really glad I chose to self publish my fiction as its given me the freedom to write the series up to book #6 and to release new books on my own schedule.

I never planned to be an author but writing is something I really enjoy doing. I seem to be reasonably good at it, and I hope that my work on both my blogs and my books has been useful to people. I used to say, after each book, that I felt like that would be my last one and I wouldn't write anything else but I think at this point I will write until I feel like I have nothing else to add and no more stories to tell.


*I don't actually consider myself a Druid anymore, as my path has diverged from there and returned to focusing solely on witchcraft, however I will say that I still think Hawthorn is a good book.
**I highly recommend it by the way if you enjoy urban fantasy that is light and fun to read.

Seeking Advanced Practice

  I see a lot of people who are looking for more advanced material - and fair enough the market is glutted with beginner books that often enough repeat the same things over and over. People read one or two beginner books and then want to move on, to read that next step that will take them into deeper practice. So why don't we see a fair number of more advanced books? Why don't we see more people writing about truly advanced witchcraft practices?

There's reasons why advanced books are hard to find and it isn't because there's no one to write them. Most obviously there's the difficulty that some advanced material is oathbound or not allowed to be shared publicly. But there actually are advanced books on the market aimed at pagans so it's not that they aren't out there; the problem is they generally don't sell well or they are very niche - because advanced tends in many cases to mean specialized. Don't sell well means that they go out of print quickly and publishers hesitate to print them. Niche means if they do see print they may be quite expensive. Many people end up going through academic texts and books that aren't necessarily on witchcraft but tangentially related material - ceremonial magic perhaps - and teasing out anything useful in order to move slowly forward into the unguided darkness.

Another problem is that while basic material is fairly easy to write about as we get further and further into esoteric subjects it gets more difficult as things become less straightforward. We pass from the almost cookie-cutter 101 material, the 'chop wood, carry water' basics, into the experiential and numinous. I can teach a person the basics of fairy etiquette but how to put into words the complexities - moral, safety, and magical - of compelling and binding a fairy in ritual? Of course I can teach it but can the layered complexities be relayed properly and can I, as the person putting the material out there, be confident that it won't be misused? what responsibility do I bear if it is misused and should I care? How do I use words to describe a scenario that may go wrong in a dozen ways, and teach every way to recover and succeed if it does go wrong? Advanced often enough is the deep water beyond theory and thought where we are plunged into actually doing, and no book can guide a person through those currents and riptides as well as an actual in-person teacher.
   
Beyond all that though we run into the not insignificant wall of what qualifies as advanced material anyway. Particularly in witchcraft this question can be almost like a zen koan; if a witch is advanced enough do they even know they are advanced? What does advanced mean in a spiritual context? In the context of magical practices? What, really, is an advanced witch? For many people it seems to be an ideal of someone who has moved beyond the basics and into the real occult secrets. Here are some of my thoughts on what exactly it means to be advanced.

1. Advanced practice usually involves things that are more dangerous or complex than basic practices. For example dealing with higher level spirits, casting magic that is harder to do in various ways, such as time involved or methods used, magic that has more intense possible consequences to the caster, or perhaps using methods in your magic that require an understanding of complex magical theories or spiritual commitments.
2. Advanced practice means building on the basics - advanced practice is advanced for a reason; it is the culmination of what has come before. You don't just get to a point where all the earlier stuff gets tossed out the window and you're on to the real mysteries. The form and methods may change but ultimately the basic lessons are still key, and they are where we start for a reason. Directing energy, cleansing, grounding - these never stop being important.  
3. Advanced practice is predicated on having mastered the basic concepts - just like in everything else you can't do the complex if you don't know how to do the simple steps that make up the complex. You can't do calculus if you don't know how to add and subtract. You can't ride a bicycle if you haven't mastered a sense of balance and coordination. 
4. Advanced takes effort - getting beyond the basics isn't something that just happens anymore than hanging out in a swimming pool every day will make you an olympic class swimmer. It takes regular practice of the basic skills and work towards more complex skills to get to that advanced point. To use another analogy its like learning dance or martial arts, you have to just keep at it, practicing regularly to gain the skills to move forward. 
5. Advanced should take time - there are no shortcuts to reaching the level of advanced material. People hate hearing this but its true. I'll point to the analogies I used above for effort because those hold true here as well. You don't take two dance lessons and become a prima ballerina and you don't go to a week of martial art classes and earn a black belt. Even someone who is extremely skilled and intelligent doesn't start and graduate college in a month with a PhD. 

Ultimately my point here is that advanced practice is often a matter of carrying forward the basic practices, and mastering them. You don't stop grounding and shielding and you don't stop cleansing your energy, no you do it until you can ground and shield in your sleep and cleanse reflexively. It is not just knowing how to do these things but knowing a dozen ways to do them under any circumstance. That is mastery, and that is what advanced practice is when we are talking about witchcraft. Advanced witchcraft is being able to use every basic lesson and amplify it, to take magic to a deeper place, to know what can and can't be done and then do the impossible anyway. It is definitely not basic practice, yet it is built on it so intrinsically that I don't think you can separate out the basic from the advanced. 

People love the idea of an advanced witch as someone who knows secrets and who commands great power - and perhaps that is true for secrets are merely hidden knowledge and power resides in all of us if we know how to find it - but everyone wants that for themselves and they want it now. When we contemplate advanced though we may find that it is not something that lends itself to instant gratification or to quick mastery. It is slow, and it is boring, and it takes its own time. And ultimately it is not or does not need to be showy or flashy to be effective. It is the repetition of the simple and basic until they are reflexive and the person can take that reflex and do amazing things with it. 

If you are seeking advanced, then keep doing the basic. Every day. Practice, practice, practice, and keep seeking out knowledge wherever you can find it. Take risks, experiment, play with your magic. Learn from your mistakes, and learn from your successes. But never stop doing.

Ipsa scientia potestas est.

 

Fairy Resource List

When it comes to studying fairy beliefs and trying to learn about fairies finding good resources can be real challenge. I've offered suggested reading lists before but this time I wanted to take a more multi-media approach. This is only a small list of suggestions, as a truly comprehensive one would take more space than I could fit in a blog.

Non-Fiction Books:
There are a lot of non-fiction books out there about fairies and many are best avoided, quite frankly. Some though are solid resources and worth reading.
A Dictionary of Fairies by Katherine Briggs - really anything by Katherine Briggs is good as she was an eminent folklorist of her time. This book is my choice to recommend because its one of my go-to's and is easy to use due its format.
The Good People: New Fairylore Essays edited by Peter Narvaez - a collection of more recent essays on the subject of fairylore from different Celtic countries, including a lot of anecdotal evidence. A modern version of 'The Fairy Faith in Celtic Countries'.
A Practical Guide to Irish Spirituality: Sli Aon Dhraoi by Lora O’Brien – a great overall introduction to modern Irish paganism that includes some good discussion on the Othercrowd. I’d also recommend the author’s older book, “Irish Witchcraft from an Irish Witch”
Fairy and Folktales of the Irish Peasantry by W. B. Yeats – a look at folklore and belief, especially fairylore.
The Gaelic Otherworld by John Campbell – an overview of Scottish folk beliefs and folk lore
The Fairy Faith in Celtic Countries by W. Y. Evans Wentz – the classic text on the Fairy Faith its a bit dated at this point having come out in 1911 but it includes fairy beliefs from a wide array of Celtic cultures.
Faeries by Brian Froud and Alan Lee – excellent artwork and some great tidbits of folklore sprinkled in
Elves, Wights and Trolls by Kveldulfr Gundarson – a look at Norse and German fairy beliefs and some comparison with the Celtic beliefs. Very useful for looking at how different closely related cultures viewed their fairies.
The Secret Commonwealth of Elves, Fauns and Fairies by reverend Robert Kirk – written in the 17th century its a short but fascinating look at traditional Scottish fairy beliefs
The Secret Commonwealth and the Fairy Belief Complex by Brian Walsh – a review and analysis of rev Kirk’s book but extremely insightful and should be read in addition to Kirk’s book for its commentary on beliefs about fairies
Meeting the Other Crowd by Eddie Lenihan and Carolyn Green – excellent book on Irish fairy lore


Fiction:
Most fiction that is based around fairies don't make a good resource here, for obvious reasons - its fiction. It was written by someone wanting to tell a good story not for the purpose of passing on actual belief or folklore. As much as we might like to think that fiction authors are actually inspired by real fairies or trying to tell a true story, much of the fairy fiction on the market is vastly at odds with traditional folklore. There are however some that are closer to traditional lore, and so I'm listing those here as resources.
The Faery Sworn Series by Ron Nieto - a trilogy about the granddaughter of a Fairy Doctor in Scotland who teams up with a kelpie to find her grandmother when she goes missing.
The Knowing by Kevin Manwaring - a story that builds off of the life and disappearance of rev. Robert Kirk.
Good Fairies of New York by Martin Miller - a bit whimsical but also gritty. Story about Celtic fairies coming to New York and those already there, how their lives collide with several humans.
Lords and Ladies by Terry Pratchett - part of Pratchett's Discworld series, and in fairness his other books are also good, but this one is my particular favorite for fairylore.


Youtube:
Ah Youtube. There's some really interesting stuff on there. Here's a couple videos I'd recommend
The Fairy Faith - a documentary that looks at fairy beliefs and anecdotes in America, Ireland, and the UK
Irish Fairylore: An Interview with Folklorist Dr. Jenny Butler - a great interview with someone who knows the subject well from an academic perspective
Folklore Collections by Michael Fortune - Michael Fortune is a treasure; he has spent time and effort recording interviews with people about their beliefs in different parts of Ireland.
Eddie Lenihan - there are a few videos of Eddie Lenihan on youtube and I highly recommend them. He is an amazing storyteller and very knowledgeable

Vimeo:
Not on youtube but really, really worth watching is the kin fables series on Vimeo.

Television and Movies:
Secret of Roan Inish - a movie about a family's multi-generational relationship with selkies, called rón in Irish.
The Spiderwick Chronicles - aimed at a very young audience, but seems to capture the idea of some traditional fairies
Pan's Labyrinth - fairly accurate, although very grim, depiction of fairies
Labyrinth - more lighthearted but truer to older folklore. A story of a girl trying to regain her baby brother from goblins; reminiscent of old changeling stories.

Fairylore in the Ballad of Tam Lin

One of the most significant Scottish ballads, from a fairylore perspective, is undoubtedly Tam Lin, which can be found under variant names and versions dating back to 1549. As eminent folklorist Katherine Briggs puts it "It is perhaps the most important of all supernatural ballads because of the many fairy beliefs incorporated in it." (Briggs, 1976, p 449). An indication of the importance of the ballad may be its popularity over the centuries and its prolific nature. Indeed there are nearly 50 versions of the ballad that I am aware of, and probably more that I am not aware of, each with variations which can be minor or major in nature. However the wider theme of the ballad remains consistent: a young woman goes to a well in a wood that is rumored to be guarded by a fairy who takes a toll from all trespassers, she becomes pregnant by him, and returns to free him from the fairies on Halloween night.

Waterhouse, 'The Flower Picker', 1895 public domain

It is worth looking more closely at the themes and plot of Tam Lin, however it is beyond the scope of this particular article to compare all of the numerous versions. I do recommend reading Acland's 'Major Variations in Tam Lin' for a better understanding of some these if it interests you. What I will be doing here is looking at the most common and to the best of my knowledge the oldest version of the ballad Child's 39A from the book 'The English and Scottish Popular Ballads' and using this as a basis of discussion. I will also look at a few important variants and additions, but not a full comparison of every version.

Below I am going to include the version of the ballad from Child's collection, but I am updating the language slightly and translating the Scots words. The original unaltered can be found free online here.  I highly recommend reading the full original ballad before reading the discussion of it below. I will present the ballad followed by my commentary.

1. O I forbid you, maidens all,
That wear gold on your hair,
To come or go by Carterhaugh,
For young Tam Lin is there.

2. There's none that go by Carterhaugh
But they leave him a treasure,
Either their rings, or green mantles,
Or else their maidenhead.

3. Janet has tucked up her green skirt
A little above her knee,
And she has braided her yellow hair
A little above her eyebrow,
And she's away to Carterhaugh

As fast as she can go

4.When she came to Carterhaugh
Tam Lin was at the well,
 And there she found his steed standing,

But away was himself.

5. She had not pulled a double rose,
A rose but only two,

Till up then started young Tam Lin,
Says, Lady, you'll pull no more.

6. Why pull you the rose, Janet,
And why break you the stem?
Or why come you to Carterhaugh

Without my command?

7. "Carterhaugh, it is my own,
My daddy gave it to me,

I'll come and go by Carterhaugh,
And ask no leave of you."

8. Janet has tucked up her green skirt

A little above her knee,
And she has braided her yellow hair
A little above her eyebrow,

And she is to her father's house,
As fast as she can go.

9. Four and twenty ladies fair
Were playing at the ball,
And out then came the fair Janet,
The flower among them all.

10, Four and twenty ladies fair
Were playing at the chess,
And out then came the fair Janet,
As green as any glass.

11. Out then spoke an old grey knight,
Laying over the castle wall,
And says, Alas, fair Janet, for you,
But we'll be blamed all.

12. "Hold your tongue, you old faced knight,
Some ill death may you die!
Father my child on whom I will,
I'll father none on you."

13. Out then spoke her father dear,
And he spoke meek and mild,
"And ever alas, sweet Janet," he says,
"I think you go with child."

14. "If that I go with child, father,
Myself must bear the blame,
There's not a lord about your hall,
Shall get the child's name.

15. "If my love were an earthly knight,
As he's an elfin grey,
I would not give my own true-love
For any lord that you have.

16. "The steed that my true love rides on
Is lighter than the wind,
With silver he is shod before,
With burning gold behind."

17. Janet has tucked up her green skirt

A little above her knee,
And she has braided her yellow hair
A little above her eyebrow,
And she's away to Carterhaugh

As fast as she can go..

18. When she came to Carterhaugh,
Tam Lin was at the well,
And there she found his steed standing,
But away was himself.

19. She had not pulled a double rose,
A rose but only two,
Till up then started young Tam Lin,
Says, Lady, you'll pull no more.

20. "Why pull you the rose, Janet,
Among the groves so green,
And all to kill the bonny babe
That we got us between?"

21. "O tell me, tell me, Tam Lin," she says,
"For his sake that died on tree [i.e. Christ's sake],
If ever you were in holy chapel,
Or christendom did see?"

22. "Roxbrugh he was my grandfather,
Took me with him to stay
And once it fell upon a day
That woe did me betide.

23. "And once it fell upon a day
A cold day and windy,
When we were from the hunting come,
That from my horse I fell,
The Queen of Fairies she caught me,

In yonder green hill to dwell.

24. "And pleasant is the fairy land,
But, an eerie tale to tell,
Yes at the end of seven years,
We pay a tiend to hell,
I am so fair and full of flesh,
I'm afraid it will be myself.

25. "But the night is Halloween, lady,
The morn is Hallowday,
Then win me, win me, if you will,
For well I know you may.

26. "Just at the dark and midnight hour
The fairy folk will ride,
And they that would their true-love win,
At Miles Cross they must bide."

27. "But how shall I know you, Tam Lin,
Or how my true-love know,
Among so many uncouth knights,
The like I never saw?"

28. "O first let pass the black, lady,
And soon let pass the brown,
But quickly run to the milk-white steed,
Pull you his rider down.

29."For I'll ride on the milk-white steed,
And yes nearest the town,
Because I was an earthly knight
They give me that renown.

30. "My right hand will be gloved, lady,
My left hand will be bare,
Tilted up shall my hat be,
And combed down shall my hair,
And that's the tokens I give you,
No doubt I will be there.

31."They'll turn me in your arms, lady,
Into a lizard and snake,
But hold me fast, and fear me not,
I am your child's father.

32. "They'll turn me to a bear so grim,
And then a lion bold,
But hold me fast, and fear me not,
And you shall love your child.

33. "Again they'll turn me in your arms
To a red hot rod of iron,
But hold me fast, and fear me not,
I'll do you no harm.

34. "And last they'll turn me in your arms
Into the burning coal,
Then throw me into well water,
O throw me in with speed.

35. "And then I'll be your own true-love,
I'll turn a naked knight,
Then cover me with your green mantle,
And hide me out o sight."

36. Gloomy, gloomy was the night,
And eerie was the way,
As fair Janet in her green mantle
To Miles Cross she did go.

37. At the dark and midnight hour
She heard the bridles sing,
She was as glad at that
As any earthly thing.

38. First she let the black pass by,
And soon she let the brown,
But quickly she ran to the milk-white steed,
And pulled the rider down.

39. So well she minded what he did say,
And young Tam Lin did win,
Soon covered him with her green mantle,
As happy as a bird in spring

40. Out then spoke the Queen of Fairies,
Out of a bush of broom,
"Them that has gotten young Tam Lin
Has gotten a stately-groom."

41. Out then spoke the Queen of Fairies,
And an angry woman was she,
"Shame betide her ill-fared face,
And an ill death may she die,
For she's taken away the handsomest  knight
In all my company.
42. "But had I known, Tam Lin," said she,
"What now this night I see,
I would have taken out your two grey eyes,
And put in two eyes of a tree."

There you have it, the most common version of the Ballad of Tam Lin. Let's take a closer look at the material.

The name Tam Lin, which elsewhere sometimes appears in variants as Tam-a-Line, Tam o the Lin and Tamlane is not a proper name but what we might understand as a nickname or name with epithet. Tam is a version of Tom. Lin, or Linn, has several meanings in Scots but the most likely here is a waterfall or pool of water; a Lane is a slow moving stream. Tam Lin may be read as Tom of the Pool or Tom of the Waterfall and Tamlane similarly as Tom of the stream, which of course makes perfect sense for a fairy who guards a well in the Carterhaugh woods. In some alternate versions the fairy knight is named as True Thomas, conflating this story with that other ballad of a Fairy Queen abducting a man, possibly due to both characters having similar names, Tam/Tom and Thomas. 

Tam Lin initially appears as a mysterious figure who controls the woods of Carterhaugh. He expects a toll from trespassers of something valuable which is listed here as either jewelry, green cloaks, or the virginity of maidens. The mention of green is interesting, as green is particularly a fairy color and was seen as an unlucky color for women to wear for this reason. The mention of it here may be the first hint of fairy involvement. Janet - given different names in some other versions - has heard the warning about Tam Lin and decided to go to Carterhaugh, in alternate versions such as we see in 39C going "By the only light of the moon". It should be noted here that Janet has been told that Tam Lin expects sex from maidens and is intentionally going there, which at least implies that she accepts this as a possibility. She has also dressed in a green skirt, which as was just mentioned is a fairy color normally not worn by women. I have always personally seen this as indicating that Janet knew exactly what she was doing and intended to go find herself a fairy lover.

Janet arrives in the Carterhaugh wood at the well that Tam Lin guards and finds Tam Lin's horse, but not Tam Lin himself. The verse states that Tam Lin is at the well however implying that although she may not see him he is nearby. It is possible that this is an allusion to fairy glamour or enchantment. Finding the fairy horse but not the guardian she was looking for she picks two roses, taking from the place that Tam Lin guards. This naturally, immediately, summons Tam Lin to her side. You have to admire Janet's directness here, as we see her intentionally invoking Tam Lin with her actions. I might suggest that this is not generally the wisest course of action, as usually disturbing or violating a place guarded by fairies results in retribution; in this case we see instead a conversation. 

The interaction between the two as related in the ballad doesn't include any sex, although we will find out later that occured but was not directly mentioned; in various alternate versions the sex is more obviously stated and is usually clearly consensual but not always so*. For example:

"He's taken her by the milk-white hand

Among the leaves so green
And what they did I cannot say
The leaves they were between" (39I)

and 

"He took her by the milk-white hand

And gently laid her down,
Just in below some shady trees
Where the green leaves hung down." (39J)

What we do have in 39A however is Tam Lin challenging Janet over her trespassing on the place he guards and her pulling of the roses. Janet's response is to tell him that she is the one who owns Carterhaugh and so doesn't need his permission. Its pretty obvious at this point that Janet just doesn't back down from anyone, including Fairy Knights, which may be why - as we see later in the ballad - Tam Lin chooses her to save him from Fairy. 

As far as we can tell from the ballad Janet has no further contact with Tam Lin after returning home to her father's hall. It soon becomes obvious to those around her that she is pregnant and one of her father's knights accuses her of as much, worrying that she will get them in trouble. Here we see an illustration of why I like Janet so much in this version of the ballad. She has been publicly accused of a significant social transgression - sex out of wedlock and pregnancy from it - and her response is to yell back and tell the knight, effectively, to shut up and curse him with an ill death, that whoever she has a child with it won't be him. Now that it's been brought out in public her father also asks if she is pregnant, although we may note he speaks to her 'meek and mild'. She doesn't outright admit that she is, but says that if she is she will take the blame for it because no man in her father's hall is responsible. 

Janet then does admit that her lover is one of the Other Crowd, and despite having as far as we are aware only one tryst with Tam Lin she declares that he is her true love and that she will not give him up for any mortal lord. She then describes his horse, an interesting bit of lore from our perspective, as lighter than the wind and having silver horse shoes in front and gold in back. The horse shoes are interesting, although tangential, but give us an idea of what fairy horses may be shod with since iron is obviously not an option. Why the two different kinds of metal? It's hard to say but it could represent the animal's ability to travel between the two worlds. 

Janet immediately goes back to Carterhaugh after this and once again finding the horse at the well and not Tam Lin, pulls two roses to invoke him. He appears and tells her to stop but also asks her why she wants to abort the child she is carrying. Although in other versions of the ballad Janet is advised to take such an action or is pulling not roses but abortifacient herbs in this version there has been no mention of such implying that Tam Lin has some supernatural knowledge of her intentions. Janet questions him about whether he is truly one of the Gentry or is a mortal man and he tells her how he was claimed by the Fairy Queen after falling from his horse. It is quite likely that this is an analogy for dying, and reinforces the blurred lines between the fairies and the dead that is often seen throughout folklore. 

At this point in another version, 39I, we see the following passage which isn't present in 39A but is pertinent for our discussion here:
31. The Queen of Fairies kept me

In yonder green hill to dwell,
And I'm a fairy, lyth [joint] and limb,
Fair lady, view me well.

32."But we that live in Fairy-land
No sickness know nor pain;
I quit my body when I will,
And take to it again.

33.'I quit my body when I please,
Or unto it repair;
We can inhabit at our ease
In either earth or air.

34.'Our shapes and size we can convert
To either large or small;
An old nut-shell's the same to us
As is the lofty hall.

35.We sleep in rose-buds soft and sweet
We revel in the stream;
We wander lightly on the wind
Or glide on a sunbeam.

36.'And all our wants are well supplied
From every rich man's store,
Who thankless sins the gifts he gets,
And vainly grasps for more.'

I'm including this here, as it appears in Child's notes, because I feel that it offers some essential information about the nature of fairies. In this version Tamlane has just told Janet that he knew her as a child and that he was born a human son to the Earl of Murray before being taken by the Queen of Fairies. Yet he also explicitly tells her that he is 'a fairy, lyth [joint] and limb'. This confirms that the fairies may take a person and by some means transform that person into one of their own kind. He then goes on to describe to her what it is like to be a fairy, including the facts that they do not get sick or know pain, can leave their bodies or re-enter them, change their sizes, and exist as either physical beings or ethereal ones ('we can inhabit at our ease in either earth or air'). He finally references something mentioned by both rev. Kirk in the 17th century and Campbell in the 19th writing on fairies, that fairies will take the substance or produce of food if a person speaks ill of their own crops or stores and that it is one this that they live. 

He also expresses his concern over being given to Hell as part of the teind paid on All Hallows (I've discussed the fairies tithe to Hell previously in depth here) and tells her that she can rescue him if she is brave enough. What follows is a very specific method of rescuing a person during a fairy procession, although it is possible that this only works because Janet is very brave and because she is carrying Tam Lin's child. In other examples of this method being used the person doing it shared a blood relationship with the person they were trying to save, and I suspect that being related by blood in some manner is an essential factor, which may be why Tam Lin hadn't mentioned it earlier, although the timing of Halloween may also have played a part. In a similar story, The Faerie Oak of Corriewater, a woman tries and fails to save her brother in a similar situation, indicating that this method is certainly not fool proof and that Janet was indeed risking her life to save Tam Lin. 

Janet is advised to go to Miles Cross on Halloween and wait for the fairy procession to ride past at midnight, perhaps meaning that the timing of midnight on Halloween is essential, or perhaps merely referencing that this was the usual point that the fairy rade rode out. In some versions it is specifically mentioned that he is riding with the Seelie Court: 

"The night, the night is Halloween,

Our seely court maun ride,

Thro England and thro Ireland both,
And a' the warld wide." 

- "A fragment of Young Tamlane," Hinloch MSS, V, 391(Child, 1898)

I feel it important to add that in an alternate version, 39D, the protagonist carries holy water and uses it to make a 'compass' or circle around herself before the fairies emerge from the mound. This can be seen as a protective gesture on her part and also perhaps explain why the fairies do not perceive her presence until she breaks the circle to grab Tam Lin down from his horse. 

It is mentioned that because of his renown Tam Lin will be riding on a white horse; the idea of white horses carrying people of significance in Fairy is something we see repeated often in different places but it is worth noting here. The Queen of Fairies herself is said to ride on a white horse in many stories, and white animals are often messengers of the Otherworld. In the few versions where he is not riding a white horse he is riding next to the Queen herself, mounted on a 'blood-red steed', with red also having significant - and far grimmer - Otherworldly meaning. Janet is alerted to the approach of the fairy rade by the sound of bridle bells, as the ballad says 'she heard the bridles sing' referencing the belief that fairies attached silver bells to their horses bridles and manes when they rode in processions.

Once she has pulled him from his horse we see the fairies turning Tam Lin into a variety of fearsome things, finally ending by turning him into a coal which Janet must throw into a well. From the water Tam Lin emerges as a naked man and Janet covers him with her green cloak, claiming him with this act. It is likely that there is great significance in his final forms being heated iron and a burning coal and that he must, in a fiery form, be thrust into well water. Tam Lin did himself guard a well and wells were often sacred and viewed as both powerful and healing. 

Having withstood these trials and won Tam Lin the fairies cannot take him back again, although its unclear whether he has regained his mortality or not. For her efforts Janet wins a bridegroom and a father for her child, but she is also cursed by the Fairy Queen, who wishes of her 'an ill death may she die'. Arguably Tam Lin is the truest winner here, having avoided being tithed to Hell, being returned to mortal earth, and getting a well-off wife and child into the bargain. The Queen's parting words imply that if she had foreseen these events the she could have prevented it by either literally blinding Tam Lin or, perhaps, by altering his sight less literally so that he wasn't moved by Janet's beauty, depending on how we choose to interpret her giving him the eyes of a tree. It is implied in some, and out righted stated in others, that the Fairy Queen loved Tam Lin herself, although it is ambiguous as to whether this was romantic love or more maternal, she having taken him in many versions when he was only a boy: 

"Out and spak the queen o fairies,

Out o a shot o wheat,
She that has gotten young Tamlane
Has gotten my heart's delight."

 - 'Tamlane,' " Scotch Ballads, Materials for Border Minstrelsy," No 96 a

What can we learn then from Tam Lin? It's a complicated question and a layered answer. Janet, arguably, goes out seeking a fairy lover and finds one. She does this by dressing in green and going to a well in a wood that is known to have a fairy guardian who takes a toll from trespassers, including having sex with them. She possibly goes at night, by the light of the moon, perhaps a full moon? She invokes him by picking forbidden flowers, the property of the fairies. The two talk and it is later implied (stated in other versions) they have a tryst which results in a pregnancy, putting Janet in  a difficult position with her family, so she goes back to Carterhaugh and invokes Tam Lin a second time. He then gives her a means to rescue him, something that may only work because the timing is right and Janet is stubborn, fearless, and carrying his child. We learn about how to invoke fairies, and what payments they may expect. We learn as well how a mortal might become one of the Good People, what that might mean, and how he might be rescued. We see that a fairy lover can be gained, and even won away from the fairies, if one is brave.

One is left wondering about Janet's fate though, since she has clearly earned the enmity of the Fairy Queen...

*In some later versions of the ballad the sexual encounter between Janet (by any name) and Tam Lin is clearly non-consensual. This requires an entire essay of its own to unpack and I highly recommend reading Acland's 'Is Tam Lin a Rape Story?'. I agree with all the author's points and tend to favor her third argument as it relates specifically to the original ballad of Tam Lin. 

References

Briggs, K., (1976) A Dictionary of Fairies

Child, F., (1898) The English and Scottish Popular Ballads

Acland, A., (1997) Tam Lin

Acland, A., (2015). Is Tam Lin a Rape Story?

Copyright M. Daimler 2017

Online Morrigan Resources

I often see people asking for recommendations for online accessible resources for the Morrigan, so I thought today I'd offer my personal suggestions. None of these are necessarily blanket endorsements but these are resources that can be found online, are free, and are worth reading. As with anything else in life remember to use critical thinking and to keep in mind that on this subject there can be a variety of opinions.

Dissertations and Papers - There are some great academic works out there on the Morrigan worth checking out. There are also some that I don't entirely agree with but still recommend because they add important layers to any discussion about this complex deity/deities.

1. War-goddesses, furies and scald crows: The use of the word badb in early Irish literature by Kim Heidja  
2. The 'Mast' of Macha: The Celtic Irish and the War Goddess of Ireland by Catherine Mowat
3. War Goddess: The Morrigan and Her Germano-Celtic Counterparts by Angelique Gulermovich Epstein
4. Demonology, allegory and translation: the Furies and the Morrigan by Michael Clarke
5. The ‘Terror of the Night’ and the Morrígain: Shifting Faces of the Supernatural. - by Jacqueline Borsje 

Blogs - There are a lot of people who blog about the Morrigan these days and I will admit my own suggestions will be limited to people I know, and read regularly. I don't go out looking around for new Morrigan bloggers because I just don't have time. You'll also note this only includes written blogs, which isn't an intentional snub to vloggers or youtbers just a reflection that I hardly ever have time to watch videos on my pc so I can't recommend them (since I haven't really watched many).

1. Call of the Morrigan: A Community Blog for the Great Queen - a great community based blog that offers a variety of views and opinions by different authors
2. Dark Goddess Musings - the blog of author Stephanie Woodfield. Not updated regularly, but has interesting content
3. Lora O'Brien - Author and Freelance Writer - what it says on the tin. Not Morrigan specific but there are Morrigan posts to be found and Lora's writing is always good and worth reading. Lora also offers paid courses on the Morrigan and several other related topics that I highly recommend.
4. Under the Ancient Oaks - the blog of Druid and author John Beckett. Not Morrigan exclusive either but she is a frequent topic. 

Websites - An assortment of Morrigan related websites out there that I am aware of and whose content is generally reliable

1. Scath na Feannoige - Morrigan content and content focused on the warrior path. Some free and some paid access, but excellent material. 
2. Mary Jones Celtic Literature Collective - as advertised, a resource for all things Celtic. your best source for myths on the Morrigan (in the Irish lit section) and also offering an encyclopedia section
3. Story Archaeology - A great resource for newer translations of the myths and discussion of the stories in context. if you search the site/podcast you'll find multiple results relating to the Morrigan 
4. Coru Cathubodua - a site by a group dedicated to the Morrigan, with articles and a resource list 

Artwork - Some of my personal favorite sources for Morrigan artwork I like. Your mileage may vary. These are not free - obviously - but I can't list Morrigan resources without including them

1. the Ever Living Ones, art of Jane Brideson 
2. Lindowyn @ Deviantart, art of Ashley Bryner
3. Gemma Zoe Jones
4. Dryad Design - statuary and jewelry by Paul Borda 

Music - We can't forget about music, after all! Its a great resource and a great way to feel connected

1. Omnia 'Morrigan'  (or this slower version)

     2. Darkest Era 'The Morrigan'

     3. Cruachan 'The Brown Bull of Cooley'
     4. Cruchan 'The Morrigan's Call'

     5. Heather Dale 'the Morrigan'

      6. Mama Gina 'Ruby' 

Books - I should probably mention here that generally I am not aware of any decent books on the Morrigan, specifically, that are available free online. You can access some older public domain works including Hennessey's 'War Goddess' on Sacred Texts but books that old have issues with some seriously outdated scholarship and need to be read with a big grain of salt. They are worth reading with some critical thinking and discernment but I wouldn't give them a blanket recommendation

Riding the River; My Journey into Paganism

 My journey into Paganism is something I've talked about before, but I don't think I've ever written explicitly about it here. Since there's a blog theme going around taking on that idea I thought it might be interesting to look at it here.

Many people when you ask them 'How did you end up pagan?' have a straightforward answer - they found a book or they met a particular person. My own story is a bit more complicated, although it does eventually involve both a book and a person, both of which I owe a great debt and neither of which continued with me on my path.

Unlike most of my peers I wasn't raised Christian. I tend to say I was raised a secular agnostic because that sums it up fairly well. We celebrated all the main American holidays but without any religious overtones - Christmas was when Santa came in his reindeer pulled sleigh to magically bring us presents and Easter was when a bunny brought us baskets of candy. I include the agnostic part because there was no firm disbelief, but neither was their any clear structure within any particular faith. We grew up hearing stories about our families history and culture, Cherokee, Irish-American, and New England with all the folklore and belief that came with that. I spent a lot of time out doors in nature, connecting to the wild world. I also had the added personal quirk of seeing spirits, something that (luckily for me) my family humored for the most part. I built little houses for the fairies and left them notes on my windowsill for as long as I could remember. But actual formal religion, there wasn't any.

I was also always a spiritual seeker, maybe because I saw things other people didn't. At various points I was curious about different religions, attending church services with my friends, reading about Judaism, I even read up on Mennonites and the Amish. Nothing ever quite fit though. And then when I was in middle school (the early 1990's) one of my best friends introduced me to a book by Scott Cunningham called 'Wicca: a Guide for the Solitary Practitioner'. For the first time I was reading about a religion - witchcraft and paganism - that made perfect sense to me. Gods and Goddesses, spirits, magic, these all resonated with me and fit into the world, spirits inclusive, that I already knew existed. I was mad for Irish culture at that point so it wasn't much effort to add in Irish mythology to to everything else and begin reading about the Irish Gods. I think I was about 11 years old.

I went to the library and found a few other books, and used my babysitting money to buy a couple more and I read what I could get my hands on at the time: Buckland's Complete Book of Witchcraft, Sybil Leek's Diary of a Witch, Laurie Cabot's Power of the Witch. At the advanced age of 12 I decided to preform a self dedication ritual, out in the cold on Imbolc. Because at 12 I was certain that this was the most amazing religion ever.

Of course within a few years, by the mid 90's, I'd started to focus more on what I'd later learn was called Celtic Reconstructionism and by 1997 I'd joined a CR Druid group called the Order of the White Oak. In 2001 I joined another Druid group, Ar nDraoicht Fein, and in 2006 I joined Our Troth after I began studying Heathenry/Asatru. I had long since stopped considering myself Wiccan but I never stopped practicing witchcraft and throughout it all the Good People - by any name - where the bedrock of my belief system and practice.

I remained a dual-trad person, both a reconstructionist Irish polytheist and a Heathen but I also began to see that over the years I had developed my own type of witchcraft, my own flavor if you will. So in 2013 I wrote a book 'Pagan Portals Fairy Witchcraft' which would be published the following year that described my witchcraft and my belief system, formed from a lifetime of experience and woven from the Fairy Faith and a reconstructionist approach to working with the Other Crowd. That of course led to another book, Fairycraft, and another (coming out later this year) Fairies. And there's another one in the works that will be out in the next year or so as well. I feel like Themselves have something to say.

Last year, as those of you who read my blog already know, was a transitional one for me. I went to Ireland a polytheist dedicated to several Gods. I came back belonging to the Daoine Maithe. Looking back on my journey to paganism and its evolution over the years I suppose it was a predictable evolution, but I honestly never saw it coming. I had always thought of my path as a tree, growing up from roots into spreading branches but always one thing always the same even as it grew. I suppose in a way that's true, but recently I've realized that my path is far more like a river - the water is always the water but the river expands and contracts, reshapes itself, slows or speeds up as it travels. It changes as it needs to change. My path has always been about the Good People even before I realized I was on a path, and I have walked it my whole life even when I wasn't aware it was there. It has changed and reshaped itself radically along the way, and that's alright. I've learned a lot.

And where I am now is not the end either.