Fairies and the Dead - An Excerpt from my W.I.P

The following is an excerpt from my forthcoming book 'Fairies: A Guidebook to the Good People'


Fairies and the Dead

The relationship and connection between the fairies and the dead is a complex one, and likely always has been. The human dead aren't fairies, except when they are. Fairies aren't the human dead, except when they might be. The places of the dead belong to the dead, except when those places are fairy mounds, like the neolithic tumuli. Even the Slua Si, whose name means 'fairy host', are sometimes said to consists of the spirits of human dead, as in some cases does the Wild Hunt, making it hard to draw any clear lines between the groups. In a very general sense we can say that human ghosts are not the same as fairies, but fairies can include people who were once human. The key difference may be, as we shall see, how exactly the human came to join the Fey.

Kildare, Ireland

There is some old Celtic belief, recorded by the Greeks and Romans, which hints at the idea of rebirth or reincarnation, that a person born in our world was dying in the Other World and a person who died in this world was born in the Other World. This idea, perhaps, explains the reason that fairies who wed mortal men were known to cry at births and laugh at funerals. It may also explain in some way why the Irish name for the Other World, an Saol Eile, literally means 'the Other Life'. It is not just another world in the sense of being a place, but it is also another life, another type of existence.

There is some suggestion that the initial depiction around the 16th century of fairies as small beings was actually related to the connection between fairies and the dead and the belief that human souls were small in appearance when separated from the physical body (Briggs, 1976). In turn this idea may reflects a related idea, that the soul was separate from the body and could leave it at times, either temporarily or permanently. We see this in the folktales were a person is taken by the fairies but their dead body is left behind and in anecdotes where a person goes into a trancelike state while their spirit is off with the fairies. The idea that the soul can be separated from the body and once separate has a reality and substance that can even be injured is an old one seen in multiple sources (Walsh, 2002). It may be difficult for us to grasp the idea of a soul as a tangible, physical thing when our modern culture tends to prefer the idea of souls as insubstantial and ephemeral but it’s clear that the older belief gave the soul substance.

Fairy tree with rags in a cemetery, Boa Island, Ireland

Another level of entanglement is more straightforward, that is sometimes the Fairies are known to take people to join them and often these people were thought to have died. In a wide array of folklore from Ireland and Wales we see stories where a young woman is thought to die and is buried, only to be seen later among the fairies in one context or another. In at least one story it was a young man who died and was buried, only to have a fairy doctor tell his family that he was among the Other Crowd; when they attempted to retrieve him he appeared and begged to be allowed to stay with the people of the sidhe (Briggs, 1976). The Scottish witch Alison Pearson claimed a dead relative was among the fairies and that it was he who acted as her familiar spirit with them (Wilby, 2005). Getting back to the earlier point about the soul as a tangible presence we must understand that these are people with presence and physicality who were interacted with and who are clearly counted among the ranks of the fairy people.

In the book ‘Fairy Faith in Celtic Countries’ several anecdotes are related that connect the Good People directly to the dead, in both the sense of describing some fairies as being humans who have died as well as saying some of them are people who were taken and thought to have died. One person related a story about a woman who died and shortly after, before the body had been buried, her husband was visited by one of the Good People who told him she wasn’t dead but taken by the fairies; the husband then waited by the body with the door open and his wife came in to see her infant at which time he grabbed her (Evans-Wentz, 1911). After being restrained and struck with a charm he had prepared the wife returned to her body, as the story was related, which revived and she went on to live a long mortal life (Evans-Wentz, 1911). In another tale with a less pleasant ending a bride died at her wedding, only to appear to her new husband later and tell him that she was actually among the fairies and that if he went to a certain place he would see her passing by and could save her (Evans-Wentz, 1911). The husband went as she’d told him to but when he saw his bride among the fairies passing by he found himself paralyzed and unable to move to grab her; he never saw her again after that, but refused to re-marry (Evans-Wentz, 1911). The people interviewed in that section of the book, who were relating the beliefs of different areas of Ireland around the turn of the 20th century, also made it clear that there were fairies who were never human and had never been human, assigning them origins among the Fir Bolg and Tuatha De Danann, as well as saying they were fallen angels. There were also those among the human dead who could and did return as ghosts or other types of undead spirits that were not considered fairies.

The entrance to Newgrange, sometimes called Bru na Si, known as a fairy mound, home of the Gods, and a neolithic burial place

The subject of the fairies and the dead is not a simple one, but it is clear that the two groups are intertwined. There are those beings who were never human spirits and those human spirits who are not and will not be fairies. But there are also those who were once human and are now fairies because the fairies themselves added the human to their ranks. The different layers of belief make it apparent that while there was crossover between fairies and the dead there was also distinction and separation of the two groups in other ways. If one could imagine it as a Venn diagram we would see fairies as one circle, the human dead as another, and the area where the two circles overlapped – how small or large that is no one can say for certain – would represent those who fall into both groups.



References:
Briggs, K., (1976) A Dictionary of Fairies
Evans-Wentz, W., (1911). The Fairy Faith in Celtic Countries
Wilby, E., (2005) Cunningfolk and Familiar Spirits
Walsh, B., (2002) The Secret Commonwealth and the Fairy Belief Complex


All text and images copyright Morgan Daimler

Connecting to my Ancestors

  I do not know exactly how long I have been honoring my ancestors, although I do know that I began doing so long before I was associating with any groups or formal religions that encourage it; I would guess probably since around the mid 90's. Of course now I know that many pagan faiths, including Heathenry and Druidism, include aspects of honoring the ancestors, both the person's own family line as well as important past figures or close family friends who are not blood relations. There are different reasons for remembering those who have come before - some people do it to keep the memory of those people alive and to nurture a sense of connection to the past; others do it because they believe that a person's spirit lives on after physical death and can be interacted with. I fall into this second group, since I have always believed that the spirit lives on and that there can still be a relationship with these spirits. I don't think my actual practice directly reflects those taught by any one faith group, rather it seems that parts of what I do are a little like what many other groups do.
     My initial approach to ancestor worship*, which is still a main part of my practice, was to create an ancestor altar. At first this served simply as a way to feel connected to my ancestors, who I had not known in life, but as relatives who I knew and loved began passing away the purpose shifted to a place I could go and talk with them, light candles for them, burn incense, and leave offerings. My first ancestor altars where simple affairs, a small collection of pictures of my relatives, eventually with a simple white candle.

My ancestor altar, circa 2004

As time went on the altar grew and became more complicated, with a decorated resin skull being added in to represent all of my ancestors whose names I did not know, but who were still with me in some sense. I also added a collection of small female statues to represent my Disir, the female ancestors who guard my family line. A special oracle set, and then two, were added for when I felt the need to consult my Dead without wanting to go the full spae route. Many of the pictures acquired little tokens or mementos, usually objects owned by that person in life, and more candles were added. In short the altar developed it's own personality.

Ancestor altar, circa 2012

  I like to light the candles on my ancestor altar and talk with my ancestors, especially my father, the way I did when they were still alive. It acts as a touchstone for me, a place I can go to honor my Dead but also a place I can go for comfort. I point each picture out to my children and tell them stories about their ancestors. I bring offerings of coffee (a staple drink in my family!) and of bread. At the holidays that they celebrated I bring candy. I also make spontaneous offerings outside, usually of coffee or hot chocolate, which seem to be the best received; I simply say whatever I feel moved to say and pour a little bit out onto the earth for them.

   Speaking of holidays they celebrated - yes my ancestors were Christians; Catholic on my fathers side and Congregationalist on my mother's. I have not found this to make any difference whatsoever in their acceptance of my honoring them, although my Catholic grandmother has asked that I have masses said for her which leads to some interesting experiences on my part. I have certain ancestors that feel closer than others and they seem to be the ones that are more likely to ask for specific things and to come through during divination or spae. Others seem content to be there in the background. Actually it reminds me a lot of the experiences I had with family functions as a child where some people were very chatty and others hung out by the food table snacking, so maybe that's a healthy dynamic to have.

    Finally I have honored my ancestors by doing a variety of genealogical research over the years. I did this to honor their memories, but it also proved to be very enlightening for me especially for my mother's side which did not have the tradition of passing down stories of the past generations the way my father's side did. I had known from a young age that my father's mother was half Cherokee and half Scottish, and that his father was the son of a German and an Irish immigrant, for example, and a variety of stories about different family members on that side. But I never knew until I researched that my mother's family had pretty much been in New England since it was a British colony, or that a member of that side of the family had fought in every single American war since the Revolutionary war. It made me feel much more connected to that side of the family. But even if that wasn't possible, even if I had no idea who my parents were or anything else further back, I would still honor them, still acknowledge their place in my life. 

   The Havamal says "Cattle die and kinsmen die,
thyself too soon must die,
but one thing never, I ween, will die, --
fair fame of one who has earned"

 So long as we remember those who have gone before us, whose lives gave us life, they are never really gone. They are our roots, our connection all the way back to the beginnings, and knowing them means knowing ourselves, who we are and where we came from. Even nameless, even unknown they are still there. I believe they can hear us when we speak to them and that they care about what happens to us, especially those people who loved us in life (blood relations or not). As long as I feel like they are there and care, I will be here, caring, speaking to them, and pouring out offerings for them.

*worship means ardent devotion or adoration, from the middle english worshipe which meant worthiness, honor. I have no issue using this word to describe what I do in honoring my ancestors, but some people feel strongly about not using this word, and prefer to use veneration, or honor. My use of the word worship is a choice, but I understand others may choose differently; if the word usage bothers you feel free to replace it with "veneration", a synonym for worship that may be more acceptable.