I was reading a blog by Nimue Brown that discusses uncertainty, something which for me is the only constant. I believe that the quest for truth, the search for spirituality, is always a matter of questions and not answers. I don't mean so much the experiential side of it, which is a solid thing to me, but the philosophical side, the questions we ask that can never be answered except with guesses and theories. I know my Gods exist, but I will never have certainty that Nuada is Elcmar, for example, or whether Odin really is Wodan. I have my own imbas about these things, but there is that endless thread of uncertainty that keeps my belief flexible instead of fixed. There are some things which are rock solid, but everything else is a matter of faith and perpetual questioning.
Reading Nimue's words reminded me of a poem I wrote almost 10 years ago, which I'd like to share.
My inconstant heart yearns
for the solidity of truth
for firm ground beneath me
What seems certain today
I doubt tomorrow
and yet I long to believe
I search for light in the dark
but see nothing except shadows
Where is the sure path to follow?
where is the clear truth to believe?
I have faith that these things exist
yet all my evidence is faithless,
I tear to shreds my own belief
yet cannot stop believing