I am an animist. This is not an uncommon statement in modern paganism (including reconstructionism) but like so many other things it is far more complex than it may appear. What I mean when I say animist, and how that worldview shapes my life, may be very different indeed from what others mean when they use the term, because in modern pagan usage it is a somewhat nebulous and often poorly implemented idea. Part of this, I think, is rooted in a poor understanding of the original term, and part in people trying to graft what can be a very foreign idea onto the worldview they were raised with.
So what is animism? Well, to start the term itself originated in anthropology in the 19th century as a way to categorize the beliefs of indigenous peoples. It is based in the Latin word "anima" which means spirit or soul. In effect animism is the belief that animals (including people), plants, natural objects and phenomena, and sometimes man-made objects have a spirit. An animistic world view can be found in all cultures at varying points and psychologist Jean Paiget theorized that animism is the natural state of belief in children. Unlike pantheism, which sees all existence as having a unified spirit, animism sees each spirit as unique; my soul is not the same soul as yours, nor is one oak the same spirit as another oak. Another thing that makes animism different from some other viewpoints is that to an animist all spirits are generally equal in significance (not, however, in Power) so that a human spirit is no more or less important in the universe than a Maple, or a squirrel, or a river. Animism does not see humans as superior or inherently more worthy than anything else. This does not mean that to an individual human or group of humans that their lives mean less but rather that they do not interact with the world with the idea that they are privileged, rather the spirits around them must be treated with respect in order for the humans themselves to succeed.
When I say I am an animist I mean that I perceive the world as being populated by spirits, in the sense described above. Material existence cannot be separated from spirit, because spirit is an integral part of all things and is manifest in the individual spirits that inhabit the world. My cats have spirits, just as I and my family do. The oaks, maples, aspen, and cedars in my yard have souls, as does the swamp behind my house. I also believe my car has a spirit as well, so I suppose I am a modern animist. Animism also shapes my belief that spirits are eternal, and so just because something has died doesn't mean it's spirit is destroyed (and Irish paganism shapes my belief in reincarnation, or "spirit recycling"). I believe it is important to live in right relation with the spirits we share the world with, just as much as we should live in right relation with our human neighbors and coworkers (and for much the same reason). This can be done by showing respect and gratitude, taking only what we need, and using everything we take. It also means that I look at the world around me as full of living spirits that are just as important as I am. I have a certain horror at the wanton, purposeless, destruction and death that is so common in a world that will clear an area of land to sell and then let it all sit and rot waiting for a non-existent buyer, or pollute and poison an area for expediency.
Now to be a bit critical. When I hear other neopagans talking about being animists I tend to see some common flaws in the way it is being approached. Some people who use the term animist actually mean pantheist, that is they believe that there is one, unified, spirit in all things not individual spirits in all things. There is nothing wrong with pantheism, and in fact you can be both a pantheist and an animist, but confusing the two terms shows a basic lack of understanding of what animism is. Other people take animism to a personalized extreme, where instead of understanding that humans are no better or worse than other spirits they elevate all spirits to the privileged status humans tend to accord themselves in non-animist views. Not only is this perspective difficult to really apply to everything but it also makes life a guilt ridden experience, when you are seeing every rock, tree, and animal as having the right to life, liberty, and happiness that you see for yourself. Animism respects all spirits, but also contains the inherent understanding that all spirits have a place in the natural order which means some are used as firewood, building materials, or food - with appreciation for the use they offer to support other life. It is offensive to waste and to take for granted what others give for us to live, but the use itself is not offensive. Life is predicated on death, in a perpetual cycle; an animist understands and honors this, and our own place within it. In contrast others take what I might call a selective animism approach where they say they are animists but only credit certain things with spirits, generally based on their own fondness for the animal/plant/object in question or desire to avoid guilt about using others. And of course, as with all things, there are those who give the idea lip service and nothing more.
I think neopaganism - indeed all religions - would benefit greatly from an animistic viewpoint. Animism in many ways gives us the best understanding of the true beauty and value of life - all life - and teaches us to honor what we need to live. It takes nothing for granted, but appreciates the cooperation needed between all things for life to continue. Animism avoids the dichotomous thinking that says a thing is either good or bad, or the view that all is good; it teaches us that there are good spirits and bad spirits, yes, but also that most spirits are simply spirits that will respond based on how they are treated. And most importantly animism disabuses us of the idea that we are privileged or special; whether we like it or not we are as valuable as everything else in the grand scheme of life.
Saturday, November 10, 2012
Friday, November 2, 2012
the Third Day of Samhain - Life without electricity
So hurricane Sandy has come and gone and my family is left without electricity. I spent the first day trying to take the romantic view and imagine that I was getting a feel for what life was like for my ancestors, but around the second day reality set in - my ancestors lived in homes designed without electricity, heated by fireplaces, with hearths to cook on. I do not. I am still trying to make the best of the situation, such as it is. As I have only random internet access when not at home I'm not in a position to put up any in depth blogs, but I will share how I have spent the first two days of Samhain and my plans for today.
My town canceled trick or treating, as 90% of people have no power, and rescheduled it for next Monday. My children were very disappointed so I decided to make the best of it. We bought some candy and the girls trick or treated from room to room, which they enjoyed very much. Then we huddled around my laptop and watched It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown as a family, which was also more fun than anticipated. Finally we held a small but meaningful ritual for the first night of Samhain were we honored the wandering dead and the daoine sidhe. A small food offering was left out and the girls went to bed. I stayed up and held a second ritual to renew my oath as a Druid of the White Oak, a yearly practice since my initiation. This year I found myself reflecting more on everything that has come to pass in the past year, the things that have changed and the accomplishments and personal challenges that have filled my life.
Last night, the second night of Samhain, we celebrated especially in honor of the Dagda and the Morrigan and their joining on Samhain before the second battle of Maige Tuired. I told the children stories about the Morrigan and the Dagda and talked about who each deity was and why we honor them. The girls shared that their "favorite" goddess is Brighid and we ended up talking about the Tuatha de Danann at some length, with me telling stories about different deities. My oldest daughter asked if there was a goddess associated with deer because she said she had dreamed about one, so I told her what I could about Flidias. We lit candles for the Gods and a special incense blend that I had made for the holiday as well and all in all had a very nice, if casual, ritual.
Today is the third day of Samhain, the time when Irish folk belief tells us that our beloved dead come back to visit. Tonight we will set out an extra plate for any who visit and an extra chair. We will light the candles on the ancestor altar and I will tell my children stories about each of their family members who rest there, as many as I can remember for as long as they will listen. The dead never truly leave us until they are forgotten.
.jpg)
My town canceled trick or treating, as 90% of people have no power, and rescheduled it for next Monday. My children were very disappointed so I decided to make the best of it. We bought some candy and the girls trick or treated from room to room, which they enjoyed very much. Then we huddled around my laptop and watched It's the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown as a family, which was also more fun than anticipated. Finally we held a small but meaningful ritual for the first night of Samhain were we honored the wandering dead and the daoine sidhe. A small food offering was left out and the girls went to bed. I stayed up and held a second ritual to renew my oath as a Druid of the White Oak, a yearly practice since my initiation. This year I found myself reflecting more on everything that has come to pass in the past year, the things that have changed and the accomplishments and personal challenges that have filled my life.
Last night, the second night of Samhain, we celebrated especially in honor of the Dagda and the Morrigan and their joining on Samhain before the second battle of Maige Tuired. I told the children stories about the Morrigan and the Dagda and talked about who each deity was and why we honor them. The girls shared that their "favorite" goddess is Brighid and we ended up talking about the Tuatha de Danann at some length, with me telling stories about different deities. My oldest daughter asked if there was a goddess associated with deer because she said she had dreamed about one, so I told her what I could about Flidias. We lit candles for the Gods and a special incense blend that I had made for the holiday as well and all in all had a very nice, if casual, ritual.
Today is the third day of Samhain, the time when Irish folk belief tells us that our beloved dead come back to visit. Tonight we will set out an extra plate for any who visit and an extra chair. We will light the candles on the ancestor altar and I will tell my children stories about each of their family members who rest there, as many as I can remember for as long as they will listen. The dead never truly leave us until they are forgotten.
.jpg)
Tuesday, October 30, 2012
After the Storm
Hurricane Sandy is being described as one of the worst - possibly the worst - in history for my area due to extreme flooding on the shoreline. Long Island Sound created a bottleneck effect for the storm surge, which was amplified by an unusually high full-moon driven high tide. My family lives in an area that borders a town on the coast and it was disconcerting to here that the neighboring town had mandatory evacuations - something that has never happened before in my memory. Nonetheless we made it through all right, with no damage on our property. Others in the state were not as lucky and my heart goes out to the families of those killed and to the people dealing with massive property damage.
Before and during the bulk of the storm I prayed and did what I could both mundanely and magically to secure my property and protect my family. All day yesterday we watched the wind increase and waited for the storm to make land fall. The day took on an anxious energy of its own as we waited for something dramatic to happen, and nothing did. We did not lose power, and while our neighbors' weeping willow fell, nothing in our yard was damaged, beyond the usual leaves and small branches coming down. As darkness fell everything intensified, until around 9 o'clock last night, when it began to slowly lessen.
With my children in bed I decided to hold a full moon ritual, using the energy of the moon and storm to bless several objects. I could have done this in several different Druidic or recon styles but instead I used ritual style that blends witchcraft and the fairy faith; I used to do things this way often a long time ago, but now I very rarely use this approach. Although I have not done things this way in a long time, it is more organic and less structured and somehow felt right under the circumstances. So I went out in the wind and rain and called on the Lord and Lady of the Greenwood, the people of the Sidhe, as well as the spirits of each direction, and my ancestors, and I focused the enrgy of the storm, of the moon, of the tide, to charge certain talismans. There was something primal and beautiful about it and at the height of everything the clouds cleared away from the face of the moon, which shone down more brightly than I have ever seen it. It was a transcendant experience that I cannot possibly put into words. I am glad I followed my heart and didn't force myself to use a more formal ritual structure.
Before and during the bulk of the storm I prayed and did what I could both mundanely and magically to secure my property and protect my family. All day yesterday we watched the wind increase and waited for the storm to make land fall. The day took on an anxious energy of its own as we waited for something dramatic to happen, and nothing did. We did not lose power, and while our neighbors' weeping willow fell, nothing in our yard was damaged, beyond the usual leaves and small branches coming down. As darkness fell everything intensified, until around 9 o'clock last night, when it began to slowly lessen.
With my children in bed I decided to hold a full moon ritual, using the energy of the moon and storm to bless several objects. I could have done this in several different Druidic or recon styles but instead I used ritual style that blends witchcraft and the fairy faith; I used to do things this way often a long time ago, but now I very rarely use this approach. Although I have not done things this way in a long time, it is more organic and less structured and somehow felt right under the circumstances. So I went out in the wind and rain and called on the Lord and Lady of the Greenwood, the people of the Sidhe, as well as the spirits of each direction, and my ancestors, and I focused the enrgy of the storm, of the moon, of the tide, to charge certain talismans. There was something primal and beautiful about it and at the height of everything the clouds cleared away from the face of the moon, which shone down more brightly than I have ever seen it. It was a transcendant experience that I cannot possibly put into words. I am glad I followed my heart and didn't force myself to use a more formal ritual structure.
 |
| The full moon shining down after my ritual before the clouds returned |
Saturday, October 27, 2012
A Prayer for Protection
Well it looks like my area is going to get a late season hurricane, nicknamed "Frankenstorm". It seems appropriate now to post a prayer for protection. This is one of my own, based loosely on the style of the Carmina Gadelica.
Prayer of Protection Against Storms
Protect, O mighty Gods,
Myself and everything near me,
My family and my home,
May we be safe through the storm,
may we be safe through the storm
From every gust and gale,
From every flood and downpour,
From every tide and storm surge,
Through the day and darkest night,
through the day and darkest night.
From every tree whose roots give way,
From every branch that breaks,
From every danger seen and unseen,
Shield us and keep us from harm
oh, shield us and keep us from harm!
(if desired this can be added as well)
The keeping of the Gods of Power on us
The keeping of Danu always on us,
The keeping of Lugh and Dagda on us,
The keeping of the three Morrigan on us
And the keeping of Nuada the silver-armed on us
King Nuada the silver-armed on us
The keeping of Brighid and Airmed on us
The keeping of all the Gods of Power
The keeping of the People of peace
The keeping of land, sea, and sky
And the ancestors watching over us
and the ancestors watching over us.
Prayer of Protection Against Storms
Protect, O mighty Gods,
Myself and everything near me,
My family and my home,
May we be safe through the storm,
may we be safe through the storm
From every gust and gale,
From every flood and downpour,
From every tide and storm surge,
Through the day and darkest night,
through the day and darkest night.
From every tree whose roots give way,
From every branch that breaks,
From every danger seen and unseen,
Shield us and keep us from harm
oh, shield us and keep us from harm!
(if desired this can be added as well)
The keeping of the Gods of Power on us
The keeping of Danu always on us,
The keeping of Lugh and Dagda on us,
The keeping of the three Morrigan on us
And the keeping of Nuada the silver-armed on us
King Nuada the silver-armed on us
The keeping of Brighid and Airmed on us
The keeping of all the Gods of Power
The keeping of the People of peace
The keeping of land, sea, and sky
And the ancestors watching over us
and the ancestors watching over us.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Living Druidism and Self-identity
"Do réir a chéile a tógtar na caisleáin."
I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to me to be a Druid, a title that for me represents a bridge between the ancient and the new. How does it shape my life? How does it affect me?
This may seem like a simple question, but I've struggled to grasp it now for a while. It's like asking how does being a woman shape my life; it influences so many aspects of my being that it is, in its own way, an intrinsic part of who I am. I tend to favor seeing the word Druid as a title, but in some vital ways it has ceased to have that meaning for me - or rather has gone beyond that - and become part of who I am. I am a Druid. If I never held another ritual, if I never taught another class, if I never sought imbas, if I ceased every action that defines the word Druid for me, I would still be a Druid because the external actions have become only a reflection of the inner process. I do not know when this happened, or how, but I know it is true.
So, how do I feel that my life reflects my religious path and role? I feel a driving responsibility to help those that need help. I teach. I run rituals for the public when I can. I care for the world I live in so that it will continue to be able to support all of us by recycling and living as best I can with nature. I try to be knowledgeable so that I can answer questions when people need answers. I hone my skills, be they magical or mundane, so that I can use them when they are needed. I do my best to serve my community when and how I can. I pass on what I know to my children and my students. I strive, not to live in harmony, but to nurture that which creates the best outcome for myself, my family, and my community. I actively use what I know and what I can do, magically, when I think it needs to be used. I pray to the Gods and spirits, make offerings, and do everything I can to nurture a strong relationship with them. But do my actions make me a Druid?
Being a Druid is judged by others based on external actions; either I fit that individual's perception of what a Druid is or I don't. My actions are judged as a if they were my beliefs, yet they are only a reflection of my beliefs. I do not live an honorable life because its what's expected or to fulfill a standard, I live an honorable life because I know that is the best way to live. I know that everything has a spirit and so I honor those spirits. I know the beauty and fierceness, power and vastness of the Gods, and so I honor them in word and deed. I know that my ancestors are with me still and so I talk to them and include them in my life. I know the might and mystery of the daoine sidhe and so I respect them. I know that energy is endless and so I have learned how to understand magic as a tool and use it when I need it. I know that all things are connected and how to read those connections under certain circumstances. I know the paths and ways of the Otherworld. I can read the sky where I live, and understand the trees and plants. I know that great wisdom lives in the old stories and folktales, myths and legends. I listen and hear the song of the aos sidhe, look and see the flow of energy, feel the potential of life. I know these things in my heart and my mind, and I live them in my spirit; my actions are a reflection of this knowing. That is what makes me a Druid.
There was a point in my life when I acted like I thought a Druid should act because I thought that was what made someone a Druid. I understand now that acting like a Druid and being a Druid are wholly different things. One is based only on action. The other is rooted in the soul.
I've been thinking a lot lately about what it means to me to be a Druid, a title that for me represents a bridge between the ancient and the new. How does it shape my life? How does it affect me?
This may seem like a simple question, but I've struggled to grasp it now for a while. It's like asking how does being a woman shape my life; it influences so many aspects of my being that it is, in its own way, an intrinsic part of who I am. I tend to favor seeing the word Druid as a title, but in some vital ways it has ceased to have that meaning for me - or rather has gone beyond that - and become part of who I am. I am a Druid. If I never held another ritual, if I never taught another class, if I never sought imbas, if I ceased every action that defines the word Druid for me, I would still be a Druid because the external actions have become only a reflection of the inner process. I do not know when this happened, or how, but I know it is true.
So, how do I feel that my life reflects my religious path and role? I feel a driving responsibility to help those that need help. I teach. I run rituals for the public when I can. I care for the world I live in so that it will continue to be able to support all of us by recycling and living as best I can with nature. I try to be knowledgeable so that I can answer questions when people need answers. I hone my skills, be they magical or mundane, so that I can use them when they are needed. I do my best to serve my community when and how I can. I pass on what I know to my children and my students. I strive, not to live in harmony, but to nurture that which creates the best outcome for myself, my family, and my community. I actively use what I know and what I can do, magically, when I think it needs to be used. I pray to the Gods and spirits, make offerings, and do everything I can to nurture a strong relationship with them. But do my actions make me a Druid?
Being a Druid is judged by others based on external actions; either I fit that individual's perception of what a Druid is or I don't. My actions are judged as a if they were my beliefs, yet they are only a reflection of my beliefs. I do not live an honorable life because its what's expected or to fulfill a standard, I live an honorable life because I know that is the best way to live. I know that everything has a spirit and so I honor those spirits. I know the beauty and fierceness, power and vastness of the Gods, and so I honor them in word and deed. I know that my ancestors are with me still and so I talk to them and include them in my life. I know the might and mystery of the daoine sidhe and so I respect them. I know that energy is endless and so I have learned how to understand magic as a tool and use it when I need it. I know that all things are connected and how to read those connections under certain circumstances. I know the paths and ways of the Otherworld. I can read the sky where I live, and understand the trees and plants. I know that great wisdom lives in the old stories and folktales, myths and legends. I listen and hear the song of the aos sidhe, look and see the flow of energy, feel the potential of life. I know these things in my heart and my mind, and I live them in my spirit; my actions are a reflection of this knowing. That is what makes me a Druid.
There was a point in my life when I acted like I thought a Druid should act because I thought that was what made someone a Druid. I understand now that acting like a Druid and being a Druid are wholly different things. One is based only on action. The other is rooted in the soul.
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
Child's Eye View of the Faery Faith
My newest book - a children's book about the fairy faith and its modenr application for pagans - has just been released in its electronic edition here https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/243674 . It's intended for children between the ages of 8 and 12 and includes activities and vocabulary relating to the topic.
Monday, October 8, 2012
Thoughts on the Testament of Morann
The Testament of Morann is the advice
given to a king on how to rule well. At first glance this piece may seem simple
and may also seem like something that doesn't apply to anyone not planning to rule,
but in fact much wisdom can be gained from studying this text. The first
section discusses the power of reciprocity and the benefits gained from holding
to the ideal of Truth. The second section teaches the new king how to judge
well and by what measure to judge all things. The final section discusses
superior things and the four types of kingship. When taken as a whole these
sections help us to see the right order of the world and how to maintain it.
It is important to understand why the
first section looks at both the power of reciprocity and the power of Truth,
because although these two concepts are often viewed as separate, in reality
they expressions of one ideal. Reciprocity is the universal balance that is
maintained; when we give, we get in return. Truth is the equilibrium of the
universe, it is the pivot point on which reciprocity rests. Each one exists as
an expression of the other and neither could exist without the other. Within
the text this is expressed through lines such as “Let him exalt mercy, it
exalth him” which teach us that the characteristics we embody will in turn be
drawn to us and “It is through the truth of the ruler that milk-yields of great
cattle are maintained.” Which shows us that is through the manifestation of Truth
that reciprocity yields positive things for the king's subjects. On a smaller
scale this can be found to hold true within the lives of each individual and
each Druid; when we speak and live Truth our lives will reflect blessings and
we will draw to us the things we embody.
The second section focuses on the king’s
judgment of all things within his kingdom. At first glance this may seem
superfluous to many of us but in fact much wisdom is hidden in these lines, for
the king is urged to judge all things by their own produce as we can see from
lines like “Let him estimate the earth by its fruits”. This is good advice for
anyone, because it urges us to judge anyone or anything only by the end
product, surely a method to reach a fair and impartial judgment. If we seek to
judge not through emotion nor based on the item or person themselves, but only
on the result or product, then we will judge fairly and well.
The final section is the most poetic of
the piece, opening with the lines
“Darkness yields to light
Sorrow yields to joy
An oaf yields to a sage
A fool yields to a wise man
A serf yeilds to a free man
Inhospitality yields to hospitality”.
Sorrow yields to joy
An oaf yields to a sage
A fool yields to a wise man
A serf yeilds to a free man
Inhospitality yields to hospitality”.
These also contain deep wisdom if studied.
The first two lines set up our understanding of the rest of the wisdom we are
shown, for indeed darkness yields to light and sorrow to joy by their own
nature and just so does a fool yield to a wise man. This is not a statement
about the intelligence of men or about the choices people make in different
situations, but rather it is a commentary on the natural order of the world and
how one condition or person yields to another. This segment then segues into a
description of 15 characteristics that the king should have, followed by a list
of ten things that “extinguish” the rule of a bad king; when studied closely we
can see that these ten are reciprocal benefits of the 15 things listed in the
previous line, reinforcing that to exemplify certain characteristics is to draw
blessings to our lives. The writer then proclaims that the king “may die” and
“will die”, and “may depart” and “will depart” but that what matters is how he
rules for that is how he will be remembered. This is important advice for us
all to remember, because we will all die one day and it is by our actions
during life that we will be judged by those who come after us. And final this
last section discusses four types of rulers: the true ruler, the wily ruler,
the oppressive ruler, and the bull ruler. We can also look at this in broader
terms as describing four types of people in general; the one who lives by
truth, the one who lives by doing what is in their own best interest, those who
live by force and outside control of others, and those who are in constant
conflict with others.
The Testament of Morann holds much wisdom
for living as a good king, or as a good Druid. It shows us how to live in
Truth, judge wisely, to seek the natural order, and describes the four types of
rulers. Knowing all of this it is up to
us to choose which of the four “types” of people we want to strive to be. If we
want to be a person who lives by Truth then this work gives us many of the
tools to find that path and master the wisdom needed for it; in the end whether
we seek to be a good ruler, a good Druid, or a good person all of these tools
will be needed.
Friday, September 28, 2012
why Reconstructionism?
 |
| self-portrait, circa 1995, oil on canvas |
The question was asked on a Facebook group I belong to, why do the group's reconstructionists follow that approach? While I no longer think of myself as a Celtic recon, per se, I do feel that reconstruction is a big part of my own practice and I enjoyed thinking about the question. I decided that I suffer from insatiable curiosity and a desire for authenticity, and that in the end is what will always make me look to reconstruction as the main methodology I use in practicing my spirituality. Needless to say this causes me endless grief and often shapes my own self-image as well as how I relate to groups and labels.
I began in neo-paganism but even at a young age was drawn to Irish material. Back in the early 90's the only way to follow that up available to me was to delve into historic and mythic literature which gave me at least a basic understanding of what was known about the actual beliefs and practices of the pagan Irish. Why I was drawn to the Irish is a bit of a separate topic, but suffice to say it was a long standing interest nurtured by family heritage and stories. I could never be satisfied following made up or imagined Irish paganism later when I began to find books by popular pagan authors that claimed to be genuine or traditionally Irish or Celtic. I think that quest for Truth is what led me into Druidism and I was lucky enough in the late 90's to find a reconstructionist Druid discussion group (which later became an Order) and that gave me the concept of practicing modern paganism based on reconstructionist principles as a viable "thing". I say lucky because this was still a time when the majority of Druidic groups where solidly Revivialist or neo-pagan; neither of which is bad, necessarily, but both of which include the very romanticism or outside influences I was trying to avoid. Finding White Oak showed me not only that I wasn't alone in seeking to learn about the actual pagan practices but also that it was possible to shape those historic practices into something modern and fulfilling. In my own way I had been practicing reconstructionism without knowing what it was for several years but finding other people was inspirational.
In the same way though I have an inherent need for mysticism and magic that pulled me beyond simply studying the material or keeping to the surface of practicing it. I was drawn to seek the practical applications of the most esoteric aspects of Irish paganism and to learn the magics talked about in the myths and stories that I read. In the end I think what drew me into Druidism was the desire to embody that same pagan magic I was reading about; at 14 I didn't want to be like Fedelm, I wanted to be Fedelm. Of course I was also driven from early on to serve my community as what can only be described as clergy. There is a certain inevitability in a person who is so driven by Irish culture, myth and magic, and a call to serve ending up being drawn to Druidism. Nonetheless I was never satisfied with the modern Druid groups who all either lacked something I was looking for or included something I was trying not to include myself. Only in finding a reconstructionist Druid Order did I find something that seemed to be exactly what I needed.
And of course years later when I came to heathenry (one explanation for that = Odin) I did so with a reconstructionist approach as well. Even when I study or teach more modern topics its always done with that reconstructionist approach that says to start at the beginning and work my way forward.
Being a reconstructionist satisfies my need for a solid historical basis while being a Druid satisfies my need for mysticism and magic. It probably seems like utter cognitive dissonance to some, but in it is the only thing that really works for me, and that is why I am a recon and that is why I am a Druid as well.
Monday, September 17, 2012
book review - the CR FAQ
Today's book review will focus on the single most recommended book for Celtic recons, the CR FAQ. This really is one of those "must read" books for anyone interested in Celtic recon, and is the product of the collaborative efforts of some of the founding members of this approach to Celtic religion. It was published in 2007 in print and appears free online at http://www.paganachd.com/faq/.
One of the best things about this book is its flexibility. It can be read straight through or used as a reference with a very thorough table of contents and in depth index making looking up anything simple. The format itself is a typical question and answer FAQ style allowing for the reader to identify a printed question that is similar to what he or she is curious about and then read the answer. However, as I stated earlier, the book also lends itself well to cover-to-cover reading.
The book begins by defining CR, Celtic, and reconstruction, giving someone new to the concepts a basis to understand the concepts. The next section looks at basic questions like whether Celtic ancestry is necessary, whether there is a particular "holy" text, solitary versus group practice, clergy and lay people, etc., This is followed by a section of intermediate questions, including a look at the place of UPG, and then sections on misconceptions, theology, ritual, ethics, druids and druidry, the difference between CR and other religions, how to get into CR, as well as a reading list and pronunciation guide. All of the topics touched on are common questions about CR and make reading the FAQ a good idea for beginners. Even after years of practice and community participation I still re-read it regularly just to re-connect with certain ideas within it.
Generally I like the book and I like that it is willing to tackle difficult issues like cultural appropriation. If it has one drawback it is the nature of the book itself - it is a FAQ and not a definitive guide to practicing CR, but then again, there is no definitive guide (nor could there be with the diverse nature of CR itself). Also each answer is fairly short and concise; there are no in depth essays on CR beliefs or practices. A person looking for a detailed explanation of how to practice will be disappointed, but for anyone who is curious about what CR is, or looking for a place to start creating an individual practice, or even someone new to the online or real world CR community that is just looking for an understanding of how it all works, this is the best place to start.
One of the best things about this book is its flexibility. It can be read straight through or used as a reference with a very thorough table of contents and in depth index making looking up anything simple. The format itself is a typical question and answer FAQ style allowing for the reader to identify a printed question that is similar to what he or she is curious about and then read the answer. However, as I stated earlier, the book also lends itself well to cover-to-cover reading.
The book begins by defining CR, Celtic, and reconstruction, giving someone new to the concepts a basis to understand the concepts. The next section looks at basic questions like whether Celtic ancestry is necessary, whether there is a particular "holy" text, solitary versus group practice, clergy and lay people, etc., This is followed by a section of intermediate questions, including a look at the place of UPG, and then sections on misconceptions, theology, ritual, ethics, druids and druidry, the difference between CR and other religions, how to get into CR, as well as a reading list and pronunciation guide. All of the topics touched on are common questions about CR and make reading the FAQ a good idea for beginners. Even after years of practice and community participation I still re-read it regularly just to re-connect with certain ideas within it.
Generally I like the book and I like that it is willing to tackle difficult issues like cultural appropriation. If it has one drawback it is the nature of the book itself - it is a FAQ and not a definitive guide to practicing CR, but then again, there is no definitive guide (nor could there be with the diverse nature of CR itself). Also each answer is fairly short and concise; there are no in depth essays on CR beliefs or practices. A person looking for a detailed explanation of how to practice will be disappointed, but for anyone who is curious about what CR is, or looking for a place to start creating an individual practice, or even someone new to the online or real world CR community that is just looking for an understanding of how it all works, this is the best place to start.
Monday, September 10, 2012
Belief and Practice
There seems to be a pervasive, underlying dualism in paganism which can be seen in the various either/or arguments that go around. Either religion or spirituality. Either modern or traditional. And at the moment, either belief or practice. It should come as no surprise to anyone who knows me and my liminal ways that I reject both hard views - the either/or paradigm - and instead my own perspective is based in balance.
The current discussion going around is centered on whether it is orthodoxy (belief) or orthopraxy (practice) that matters more. One view holds that belief is the cornerstone to everything else and that what we do is less important than what we believe; by this view community is built on a similarity of belief. We all believe the same therefore we are all the same religion. In contrast the other view holds that what we believe is less important than what we do and that community is based on a similarity of practice. We do the same thing, ritually, therefore we are the same religion. The belief argument is often held as a neopagan stance, while the practice side is held by recons. Both have their pro's and con's; similar belief can acts as common ground for those with different practices, while similar practice can act as common ground for those with different beliefs.
My sticking point in all of this is the either/or aspect, the idea that it has to be one way or the other. I believe this is a logical fallacy, a false dilemma. My experience with the pagan community over the last few decades has shown me that those who hold to the orthodoxic view still have boundaries of acceptable and unacceptable practice, just as the orthopraxic side has limits to what beliefs are and are not allowed. Most neo-pagan groups, for example, that embrace the idea of similar belief will still reject practices that involve, say, conducting a mass to the goddess in the guise of Mary, even if they all believe that Mary is a face of the Goddess. Similarly the orthopraxic groups will reject beliefs that are too far out of the accepted norm, such as CR groups that refuse to allow CR style worship to Lwa. (note that these examples are purely illustrative and not meant to imply any personal judgment in any direction). The point is that it is not nearly as clear cut or simple as the either/or. To be heathen or CR is as much about believing in the deities and cosmology - on some level - as it is practicing like everyone else. Even atheist heathens relate to the gods in some way and understand the heathen worldview. So to my mind it isn't either belief or practice, it's belief and practice.
If I had to concisely describe my own view I suppose I would say that it is experiential, because experiencing something beyond ourselves - whether that experience comes through belief or practice - seems to me to be the heart of spirituality. Rote belief or practice by themselves, to me, are not transformative or powerful, but can be tools to reach past ourselves and create that connection. Even if the experience is a simple moment, an awareness that we didn't have before, it is that experience that we should strive for. Of course I am coming from a very esoteric place and my own past experiences shape my views on the value of experience; it may well be different for everyone else, and I don't judge those who find true value without transformative experiences. Spirituality will always be unique in many ways to the individual practicing it, no matter how much common ground that person shares with their community.
I am a wanderer, and sometimes I practice with those who hold different beliefs just as sometimes I practice differently from those with similar beliefs. I do not feel that having a different belief from someone is an insurmountable issue, nor that practicing differently is the core of what defines us. A community is too diverse to ever fit into such a narrow model. No, it will always be a blend of differences and similarities, with a fine balance maintaining the homeostasis necessary for the community to exist at all. Sometimes people stray too far from the common belief or the common practice and cross that boundary of "acceptable" and then a new community is formed, but generally even in communities that emphasize orthopraxy or orthodoxy there will always be variations. It's human nature.
The current discussion going around is centered on whether it is orthodoxy (belief) or orthopraxy (practice) that matters more. One view holds that belief is the cornerstone to everything else and that what we do is less important than what we believe; by this view community is built on a similarity of belief. We all believe the same therefore we are all the same religion. In contrast the other view holds that what we believe is less important than what we do and that community is based on a similarity of practice. We do the same thing, ritually, therefore we are the same religion. The belief argument is often held as a neopagan stance, while the practice side is held by recons. Both have their pro's and con's; similar belief can acts as common ground for those with different practices, while similar practice can act as common ground for those with different beliefs.
My sticking point in all of this is the either/or aspect, the idea that it has to be one way or the other. I believe this is a logical fallacy, a false dilemma. My experience with the pagan community over the last few decades has shown me that those who hold to the orthodoxic view still have boundaries of acceptable and unacceptable practice, just as the orthopraxic side has limits to what beliefs are and are not allowed. Most neo-pagan groups, for example, that embrace the idea of similar belief will still reject practices that involve, say, conducting a mass to the goddess in the guise of Mary, even if they all believe that Mary is a face of the Goddess. Similarly the orthopraxic groups will reject beliefs that are too far out of the accepted norm, such as CR groups that refuse to allow CR style worship to Lwa. (note that these examples are purely illustrative and not meant to imply any personal judgment in any direction). The point is that it is not nearly as clear cut or simple as the either/or. To be heathen or CR is as much about believing in the deities and cosmology - on some level - as it is practicing like everyone else. Even atheist heathens relate to the gods in some way and understand the heathen worldview. So to my mind it isn't either belief or practice, it's belief and practice.
If I had to concisely describe my own view I suppose I would say that it is experiential, because experiencing something beyond ourselves - whether that experience comes through belief or practice - seems to me to be the heart of spirituality. Rote belief or practice by themselves, to me, are not transformative or powerful, but can be tools to reach past ourselves and create that connection. Even if the experience is a simple moment, an awareness that we didn't have before, it is that experience that we should strive for. Of course I am coming from a very esoteric place and my own past experiences shape my views on the value of experience; it may well be different for everyone else, and I don't judge those who find true value without transformative experiences. Spirituality will always be unique in many ways to the individual practicing it, no matter how much common ground that person shares with their community.
I am a wanderer, and sometimes I practice with those who hold different beliefs just as sometimes I practice differently from those with similar beliefs. I do not feel that having a different belief from someone is an insurmountable issue, nor that practicing differently is the core of what defines us. A community is too diverse to ever fit into such a narrow model. No, it will always be a blend of differences and similarities, with a fine balance maintaining the homeostasis necessary for the community to exist at all. Sometimes people stray too far from the common belief or the common practice and cross that boundary of "acceptable" and then a new community is formed, but generally even in communities that emphasize orthopraxy or orthodoxy there will always be variations. It's human nature.
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Artio, Germano-Celtic Bear Goddess
Sometimes the deities we feel drawn to worship are fairly well known in mythology or can easily be read about in secondary sources material, but other times we are drawn to deities that are obscure. This is the case with one of the main deities I work with, a Germano-Celtic goddess named Artio; in practical terms it means that I have a scant few references to work with and must make up the difference with personal gnosis and experience. I have hesitated to write too much in the past about Her because I knew that it would mean talking about personal practices that were developed through inspiration more than research, but it seems only fair now to offer what I know and my own experiences. Perhaps it will help others who feel drawn to or called by this particular obscure deity to feel more connected to Her.
Artio is also called Dea Artio and Andarta all names that relate to or directly mean "bear" (Monaghan, 2004). One of the best known pieces of evidence relating to Artio is an engraved statue found near Berne, Switzerland. The statue depicts a seated female figure, generally thought to be the goddess, holding a basket of fruit, facing a bear who is standing in front of a tree; an engraving on one side of the statue says: "to the goddess Artio" (Green, 1992). A second find with in inscription was found in Bollendorf, Germany, and other evidence was in France (Green, 1992; Monaghan, 2004). While the areas Artio has been found in could be considered Germanic, the name is Gallic, and She is generally described as either Germano-Celtic or Romano-Gaulish (I favor the former myself). Although the imagery of the statue is obscure and there is a lack of literary evidence, most agree that Artio was likely a goddess of fertility and plenty, and possibly a patroness of hunters as well as protector of bears (Green, 1992; Markale, 1986). Some also theorize that She was a more general goddess of the wilderness and wild things (Monaghan, 2004). Sources agree that She was also seen in the form of a bear, with Sjoestedt placing her in the category of zoomorphic goddesses alongside Epona (Sjoestedt, 1949). It seems likely that the bear goddess, Artio, was eventually replaced by a bear god, Artaios who was synchretized by the Romans to Mercury (Markale, 1986).
My connection to Artio comes through my seidhr work. When I first seriously began to practice seidhr I decided I needed to find out who or what was willing to act as a guide and protector for me. I already had a close working relationship with my Fylgja and with certain plant and animal spirits, but I suspected that taking this sort of spiritual work in a new direction would involve new Powers, beyond Odin and Freya who were already involved. I undertook a spiritual Journey and encountered a bear who was also a woman, simultaneously. She told me that she would be with me for any seidhr or spae work that I did and that her name was Arto. I had never heard that name before, but I knew that Art meant bear so I didn't think much of it. I was also told that when I did oracular spae work I should wear a bear skin instead of a veil. I assumed she was some sort of powerful spirit, and was happy that I had someone willing to be with me in this work.
By coincidence (or synchronicity) shortly after this experience I came across a fossilized cave bear tooth for sale and I bought it and made a necklace from it which I have since worn whenever doing any seidhr or spae. The bear fur was, suffice to say, much more difficult to find but did come to me in due time and I use it as I was told to. I even recently had a dream where I "won" a bear skull and was instructed to feed it by blooding it; I'm waiting to see if such a skull finds its way to me in the real world or not. I later found out that Artio was an actual historic Goddess, although there is nothing in the scant records to indicate a definite connection to any type of oracular or magical work associated with Her. I don't know why I was surprised that I ended up contacting an obscure Germano-Celtic goddess, since, in retrospect, that makes perfect sense as the sort of deity for me with my dual-trad ways. I can comfortably honor her in either a Celtic or Norse (Germanic) context, which is nice. This connection has always worked for me and I feel very protected by Her in seidhrworking and also very connected to the bear. Although I will say that my personal experiences with Her show that She can be both tender and protective and also very intense. I have encountered Her in the Spiritworld and been dismembered, for example, but I have also been healed; I have had Her in bear form charge at me roaring so that I was literally too terrified to move or even think, but She has also been very gentle with me.
I have a small shrine for Her with a collection of carved bear statues and the best image I could find of a goddess and bear. I also honor Her especially on the equinoxes. In the spring I celebrate the awakening of the bear on the spring equinox with a ritual for her that includes offerings of honey and bread. In September I celebrate the dreaming of the bear on the fall equinox with offerings of fresh fruit and vegetables. This is purely my own invention, although my kindred has adopted the practice along with me. We all practice seidhr together and have adopted Artio as a group, which seems to be working well.
Honoring Artio has forced me to trust my own intuition more and to be willing to follow my gut as I find ways to connect to a deity where there is very little existing historic information to rely on. I have also learned a great deal about bears as I worked on learning about the animal most strongly connected to this deity. Bears are amazing animals, and I have found female bears particularly interesting; they are devoted mothers and excellent teachers, verstaile and intelligent. Bears have several biological quirks, not only do they hibernate, but a female bear can delay pregnancy after fertilization through a process that scientists are still trying to understand. I encourage anyone drawn to Artio to begin studying bears as well (I've focused mostly on black bears because they are native to my region).
References:
Sjoestedt, M (1949). Celtic Gods and Heroes
Markale, J., (1986). Women of the Celts
Green, M., (1992). Dictionary of Celtic Myth and Legend
Monaghan, P., (2004). Encyclopedia of Celtic Mythology and Folklore
Artio is also called Dea Artio and Andarta all names that relate to or directly mean "bear" (Monaghan, 2004). One of the best known pieces of evidence relating to Artio is an engraved statue found near Berne, Switzerland. The statue depicts a seated female figure, generally thought to be the goddess, holding a basket of fruit, facing a bear who is standing in front of a tree; an engraving on one side of the statue says: "to the goddess Artio" (Green, 1992). A second find with in inscription was found in Bollendorf, Germany, and other evidence was in France (Green, 1992; Monaghan, 2004). While the areas Artio has been found in could be considered Germanic, the name is Gallic, and She is generally described as either Germano-Celtic or Romano-Gaulish (I favor the former myself). Although the imagery of the statue is obscure and there is a lack of literary evidence, most agree that Artio was likely a goddess of fertility and plenty, and possibly a patroness of hunters as well as protector of bears (Green, 1992; Markale, 1986). Some also theorize that She was a more general goddess of the wilderness and wild things (Monaghan, 2004). Sources agree that She was also seen in the form of a bear, with Sjoestedt placing her in the category of zoomorphic goddesses alongside Epona (Sjoestedt, 1949). It seems likely that the bear goddess, Artio, was eventually replaced by a bear god, Artaios who was synchretized by the Romans to Mercury (Markale, 1986).
My connection to Artio comes through my seidhr work. When I first seriously began to practice seidhr I decided I needed to find out who or what was willing to act as a guide and protector for me. I already had a close working relationship with my Fylgja and with certain plant and animal spirits, but I suspected that taking this sort of spiritual work in a new direction would involve new Powers, beyond Odin and Freya who were already involved. I undertook a spiritual Journey and encountered a bear who was also a woman, simultaneously. She told me that she would be with me for any seidhr or spae work that I did and that her name was Arto. I had never heard that name before, but I knew that Art meant bear so I didn't think much of it. I was also told that when I did oracular spae work I should wear a bear skin instead of a veil. I assumed she was some sort of powerful spirit, and was happy that I had someone willing to be with me in this work.
By coincidence (or synchronicity) shortly after this experience I came across a fossilized cave bear tooth for sale and I bought it and made a necklace from it which I have since worn whenever doing any seidhr or spae. The bear fur was, suffice to say, much more difficult to find but did come to me in due time and I use it as I was told to. I even recently had a dream where I "won" a bear skull and was instructed to feed it by blooding it; I'm waiting to see if such a skull finds its way to me in the real world or not. I later found out that Artio was an actual historic Goddess, although there is nothing in the scant records to indicate a definite connection to any type of oracular or magical work associated with Her. I don't know why I was surprised that I ended up contacting an obscure Germano-Celtic goddess, since, in retrospect, that makes perfect sense as the sort of deity for me with my dual-trad ways. I can comfortably honor her in either a Celtic or Norse (Germanic) context, which is nice. This connection has always worked for me and I feel very protected by Her in seidhrworking and also very connected to the bear. Although I will say that my personal experiences with Her show that She can be both tender and protective and also very intense. I have encountered Her in the Spiritworld and been dismembered, for example, but I have also been healed; I have had Her in bear form charge at me roaring so that I was literally too terrified to move or even think, but She has also been very gentle with me.
I have a small shrine for Her with a collection of carved bear statues and the best image I could find of a goddess and bear. I also honor Her especially on the equinoxes. In the spring I celebrate the awakening of the bear on the spring equinox with a ritual for her that includes offerings of honey and bread. In September I celebrate the dreaming of the bear on the fall equinox with offerings of fresh fruit and vegetables. This is purely my own invention, although my kindred has adopted the practice along with me. We all practice seidhr together and have adopted Artio as a group, which seems to be working well.
Honoring Artio has forced me to trust my own intuition more and to be willing to follow my gut as I find ways to connect to a deity where there is very little existing historic information to rely on. I have also learned a great deal about bears as I worked on learning about the animal most strongly connected to this deity. Bears are amazing animals, and I have found female bears particularly interesting; they are devoted mothers and excellent teachers, verstaile and intelligent. Bears have several biological quirks, not only do they hibernate, but a female bear can delay pregnancy after fertilization through a process that scientists are still trying to understand. I encourage anyone drawn to Artio to begin studying bears as well (I've focused mostly on black bears because they are native to my region).
References:
Sjoestedt, M (1949). Celtic Gods and Heroes
Markale, J., (1986). Women of the Celts
Green, M., (1992). Dictionary of Celtic Myth and Legend
Monaghan, P., (2004). Encyclopedia of Celtic Mythology and Folklore
Monday, September 3, 2012
Connecting to my Ancestors
I do not know exactly how long I have been honoring my ancestors, although I do know that I began doing so long before I was associating with any groups or formal religions that encourage it; I would guess probably since around the mid 90's. Of course now I know that many pagan faiths, including Heathenry and Druidism, include aspects of honoring the ancestors, both the person's own family line as well as important past figures or close family friends who are not blood relations. There are different reasons for remembering those who have come before - some people do it to keep the memory of those people alive and to nurture a sense of connection to the past; others do it because they believe that a person's spirit lives on after physical death and can be interacted with. I fall into this second group, since I have always believed that the spirit lives on and that there can still be a relationship with these spirits. I don't think my actual practice directly reflects those taught by any one faith group, rather it seems that parts of what I do are a little like what many other groups do.
My initial approach to ancestor worship*, which is still a main part of my practice, was to create an ancestor altar. At first this served simply as a way to feel connected to my ancestors, who I had not known in life, but as relatives who I knew and loved began passing away the purpose shifted to a place I could go and talk with them, light candles for them, burn incense, and leave offerings. My first ancestor altars where simple affairs, a small collection of pictures of my relatives, eventually with a simple white candle.
As time went on the altar grew and became more complicated, with a decorated resin skull being added in to represent all of my ancestors whose names I did not know, but who were still with me in some sense. I also added a collection of small female statues to represent my Disir, the female ancestors who guard my family line. A special oracle set, and then two, were added for when I felt the need to consult my Dead without wanting to go the full spae route. Many of the pictures acquired little tokens or mementos, usually objects owned by that person in life, and more candles were added. In short the altar developed it's own personality.
I like to light the candles on my ancestor altar and talk with my ancestors, especially my father, the way I did when they were still alive. It acts as a touchstone for me, a place I can go to honor my Dead but also a place I can go for comfort. I point each picture out to my children and tell them stories about their ancestors. I bring offerings of coffee (a staple drink in my family!) and of bread. At the holidays that they celebrated I bring candy. I also make spontaneous offerings outside, usually of coffee or hot chocolate, which seem to be the best received; I simply say whatever I feel moved to say and pour a little bit out onto the earth for them.
My initial approach to ancestor worship*, which is still a main part of my practice, was to create an ancestor altar. At first this served simply as a way to feel connected to my ancestors, who I had not known in life, but as relatives who I knew and loved began passing away the purpose shifted to a place I could go and talk with them, light candles for them, burn incense, and leave offerings. My first ancestor altars where simple affairs, a small collection of pictures of my relatives, eventually with a simple white candle.
.jpg) |
| My ancestor altar, circa 2004 |
.jpg) |
| Ancestor altar, circa 2012 |
Speaking of holidays they celebrated - yes my ancestors were Christians; Catholic on my fathers side and Congregationalist on my mother's. I have not found this to make any difference whatsoever in their acceptance of my honoring them, although my Catholic grandmother has asked that I have masses said for her which leads to some interesting experiences on my part. I have certain ancestors that feel closer than others and they seem to be the ones that are more likely to ask for specific things and to come through during divination or spae. Others seem content to be there in the background. Actually it reminds me a lot of the experiences I had with family functions as a child where some people were very chatty and others hung out by the food table snacking, so maybe that's a healthy dynamic to have.
Finally I have honored my ancestors by doing a variety of genealogical research over the years. I did this to honor their memories, but it also proved to be very enlightening for me especially for my mother's side which did not have the tradition of passing down stories of the past generations the way my father's side did. I had known from a young age that my father's mother was half Cherokee and half Scottish, and that his father was the son of a German and an Irish immigrant, for example, and a variety of stories about different family members on that side. But I never knew until I researched that my mother's family had pretty much been in New England since it was a British colony, or that a member of that side of the family had fought in every single American war since the Revolutionary war. It made me feel much more connected to that side of the family. But even if that wasn't possible, even if I had no idea who my parents were or anything else further back, I would still honor them, still acknowledge their place in my life.
The Havamal says "Cattle die and kinsmen die,
thyself too soon must die,
but one thing never, I ween, will die, --
fair fame of one who has earned"
thyself too soon must die,
but one thing never, I ween, will die, --
fair fame of one who has earned"
So long as we remember those who have gone before us, whose lives gave us life, they are never really gone. They are our roots, our connection all the way back to the beginnings, and knowing them means knowing ourselves, who we are and where we came from. Even nameless, even unknown they are still there. I believe they can hear us when we speak to them and that they care about what happens to us, especially those people who loved us in life (blood relations or not). As long as I feel like they are there and care, I will be here, caring, speaking to them, and pouring out offerings for them.
*worship means ardent devotion or adoration, from the middle english worshipe which meant worthiness, honor. I have no issue using this word to describe what I do in honoring my ancestors, but some people feel strongly about not using this word, and prefer to use veneration, or honor. My use of the word worship is a choice, but I understand others may choose differently; if the word usage bothers you feel free to replace it with "veneration", a synonym for worship that may be more acceptable.
*worship means ardent devotion or adoration, from the middle english worshipe which meant worthiness, honor. I have no issue using this word to describe what I do in honoring my ancestors, but some people feel strongly about not using this word, and prefer to use veneration, or honor. My use of the word worship is a choice, but I understand others may choose differently; if the word usage bothers you feel free to replace it with "veneration", a synonym for worship that may be more acceptable.
Sunday, September 2, 2012
Ch-ch-ch-changes
So I have renamed the blog and given it a new look. My goal in overhauling and renaming the blog is to make the content more balanced and more reflective of my life, as oppossed to my research (I’ll still include that too of course). I feel like the blog has become, to some degree, about fulfilling expectations rather than expressing my own thoughts and practices. I’d like to get it back on track and I feel like this is a great way to do that. In reality this probably won’t amount to a huge change, more like a subtle shift, but I am excited to see things moving a new directions.
The new name is based on a suggestion from a friend. I like it on several levels: I am dedicated to Woden (Odin, Wotan, He-of-the-many-names), like Him I am a wanderer with a thirst for knowledge, and I am a witch whether you call it seidhr, folk magic, or what-have-you. It feels like an honest name that describes better who I am and what I do. That name, with it's three w's, relates to the rune wunjo which I have a special association with myself and also, as that same friend pointed out, lends itself nicely to a combination of the three w's and the valknut symbol which is often considered to be Odin's.
.jpg) |
| rough draft of design |
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
book review - The Nature of Asatru
Time for another book review. This time I decided to update and share a review I did 5 years ago in the journal Idunna for a book by Mark Puryear called "The Nature of Asatru". If you have read and liked this book don't even bother reading this review, because I can summarize it concisely by saying that I feel this is the Asatru equivalent of the 21 Lessons of Merlin.
Looking at the back of the book it seems like it should be an ideal beginner's book; Puryear has almost 20 years experience in Asatru and is a member of a group, the Asatru Nation, which is an American offshoot of Australia's Odinic Rite. The book is touted as an introduction to the core values of Asatru, yet it quickly becomes apparent when reading the text that instead of describing widely held universal beliefs of Asatru the book is actually focused exclusively on the beliefs of Puryear's particular group, which are not in any way universal. Exactly the opposite in fact - the book is full of controversial theories, misinformation, and foreign elements. The author is also insistent that Asatru has no subgroups or denominations, despite the wide range of modern practices, and lumps all Asatruar in with the Asatru Nation/Odinic Rite. This by itself is a serious problem.
The book's tone is both racist and homophobic, reinforcing the stereotype that Asatruar are all like this. Puryear blends a bizarre sort of political correctness in with his bigotry, encouraging tolerance of other people's choices while strongly condemning miscegeny and homosexuality. He describes children with mixed heritage as having no ancestral roots and miscegeny as genocide and stops just short of encouraging people of Northern European descent to breed together to save their "race". He does flatly state that the "white race" is failing due to being outbred and not keeping the bloodlines pure. The attempts to make this more palatable with politically correct buzz words fails, at least with me. Personally as someone of mixed heritage I found it repugnant and offensive, and his wife's essay in the appendices about a woman's place compounded it by adding misogyny into the mix, albeit cleverly disguised.
The book includes many elements that seem to me to be foreign to Asatru, although I profess a very minimal knowledge of the Odinic Rite; it is possible that this is the norm for that group. Puryear says that the gods meet daily to judge the souls of the dead and assign them a place in the afterlife; not something I've heard anyone else supporting. He also very strongly divides Norse magic into "good" galdr and "evil" seidhr, going so far as to say that Gullveg was burned by the Aesir as a punishment for teaching evil seidhr to humanity. (Apperantly he ignores Freya teaching seidhr to Odin). He describes Helheim as a land of bliss. He adds nine vices to the accepted 9 noble virtues and these vices appear to be an odd mix of the Christian 10 commandments and deadly sins. He describes the Aesir and Vanir as nearly-archetypal deities of goodness, with Loki as the opposing force of pure evil He also inaccurately claims that there are no modern followers or cults to Loki. The author's ideas about orlag seem to me to be closer to the Wiccan concept of the law of 3 than the common heathen views, with his belief that orlag is about what we put out coming back to us. He also divides offerings into four catagories based on the four classical elements of earth, air, fire, and water, which struck me as being very odd.
The book's mythology was heavily influenced by the writings of Viktor Rydburg, who attempted to homogenize all Norse and Germanic mythology into a single system, with predictable results. Rydburg is not widely accepted in mainstream heathenry, yet the book presents his theories as facts without any explanation of the source material or normal views. Puryear describes Frigga as the sister of Njordh and mother of Freya, Frey, and 8 others with him, for example, which is not a widely held belief in heathenry. He equates Gullveg to Angrboda and lists Gullveg as the mother of Loki's children; in turn he says that Hel is not Loki's daughter but rather that Urd rules Helheim with Loki's daughter, named Leiken, as a minor servant. He describes Baldr as the most popular heathen god and relegates Tyr to the role of warrior and son of Odin, while denying his role as god of justice and god of the Thing which are the widely accepted views of Tyr. He describes Skadi, who is normally viewed as giantess who married into the Aesir, as the daughter of Volund (the smith) and Idunna. In his book Sunna and Mani are alfs and their mother is Nott (or Nat) who he claims is actually Ostara. I could go on, but hopefully that is enough to demonstrate the odd material presented on the gods, the majority of which is not widely accepted by the larger community. I think presenting it as if it were fact or accepted lore does a great disservice to beginners who will not realize that these are not popular beliefs.
Facts that should have been easily checked are wrong, such as the authors assertion that the most common modern and ancient method of humane animal sacrifice is beheading the animal - this statement is followed by a rambling discussion of the guillotine. The book itself is inly 127 pages long, follwed by an equally long appendices which include an essay by the author's wife about a heathen woman's place (in the home caring for her family) and a cobbled-together version of the Havamal.
In short this book is the last thing a beginner should read as it is often off-putting, offensive, confusing, and factually incorrect. While it is always best to start with the myths themselves - the poetic and prose Eddas are generally recommended - both volumes of Our Troth and Diana Paxson's book Essential Asatru would also be good for those just developing an interest in Asatru.
Looking at the back of the book it seems like it should be an ideal beginner's book; Puryear has almost 20 years experience in Asatru and is a member of a group, the Asatru Nation, which is an American offshoot of Australia's Odinic Rite. The book is touted as an introduction to the core values of Asatru, yet it quickly becomes apparent when reading the text that instead of describing widely held universal beliefs of Asatru the book is actually focused exclusively on the beliefs of Puryear's particular group, which are not in any way universal. Exactly the opposite in fact - the book is full of controversial theories, misinformation, and foreign elements. The author is also insistent that Asatru has no subgroups or denominations, despite the wide range of modern practices, and lumps all Asatruar in with the Asatru Nation/Odinic Rite. This by itself is a serious problem.
The book's tone is both racist and homophobic, reinforcing the stereotype that Asatruar are all like this. Puryear blends a bizarre sort of political correctness in with his bigotry, encouraging tolerance of other people's choices while strongly condemning miscegeny and homosexuality. He describes children with mixed heritage as having no ancestral roots and miscegeny as genocide and stops just short of encouraging people of Northern European descent to breed together to save their "race". He does flatly state that the "white race" is failing due to being outbred and not keeping the bloodlines pure. The attempts to make this more palatable with politically correct buzz words fails, at least with me. Personally as someone of mixed heritage I found it repugnant and offensive, and his wife's essay in the appendices about a woman's place compounded it by adding misogyny into the mix, albeit cleverly disguised.
The book includes many elements that seem to me to be foreign to Asatru, although I profess a very minimal knowledge of the Odinic Rite; it is possible that this is the norm for that group. Puryear says that the gods meet daily to judge the souls of the dead and assign them a place in the afterlife; not something I've heard anyone else supporting. He also very strongly divides Norse magic into "good" galdr and "evil" seidhr, going so far as to say that Gullveg was burned by the Aesir as a punishment for teaching evil seidhr to humanity. (Apperantly he ignores Freya teaching seidhr to Odin). He describes Helheim as a land of bliss. He adds nine vices to the accepted 9 noble virtues and these vices appear to be an odd mix of the Christian 10 commandments and deadly sins. He describes the Aesir and Vanir as nearly-archetypal deities of goodness, with Loki as the opposing force of pure evil He also inaccurately claims that there are no modern followers or cults to Loki. The author's ideas about orlag seem to me to be closer to the Wiccan concept of the law of 3 than the common heathen views, with his belief that orlag is about what we put out coming back to us. He also divides offerings into four catagories based on the four classical elements of earth, air, fire, and water, which struck me as being very odd.
The book's mythology was heavily influenced by the writings of Viktor Rydburg, who attempted to homogenize all Norse and Germanic mythology into a single system, with predictable results. Rydburg is not widely accepted in mainstream heathenry, yet the book presents his theories as facts without any explanation of the source material or normal views. Puryear describes Frigga as the sister of Njordh and mother of Freya, Frey, and 8 others with him, for example, which is not a widely held belief in heathenry. He equates Gullveg to Angrboda and lists Gullveg as the mother of Loki's children; in turn he says that Hel is not Loki's daughter but rather that Urd rules Helheim with Loki's daughter, named Leiken, as a minor servant. He describes Baldr as the most popular heathen god and relegates Tyr to the role of warrior and son of Odin, while denying his role as god of justice and god of the Thing which are the widely accepted views of Tyr. He describes Skadi, who is normally viewed as giantess who married into the Aesir, as the daughter of Volund (the smith) and Idunna. In his book Sunna and Mani are alfs and their mother is Nott (or Nat) who he claims is actually Ostara. I could go on, but hopefully that is enough to demonstrate the odd material presented on the gods, the majority of which is not widely accepted by the larger community. I think presenting it as if it were fact or accepted lore does a great disservice to beginners who will not realize that these are not popular beliefs.
Facts that should have been easily checked are wrong, such as the authors assertion that the most common modern and ancient method of humane animal sacrifice is beheading the animal - this statement is followed by a rambling discussion of the guillotine. The book itself is inly 127 pages long, follwed by an equally long appendices which include an essay by the author's wife about a heathen woman's place (in the home caring for her family) and a cobbled-together version of the Havamal.
In short this book is the last thing a beginner should read as it is often off-putting, offensive, confusing, and factually incorrect. While it is always best to start with the myths themselves - the poetic and prose Eddas are generally recommended - both volumes of Our Troth and Diana Paxson's book Essential Asatru would also be good for those just developing an interest in Asatru.
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Thoughts on the Colloquy of the Two Sages
One of the most important texts for modern
druids to study may be the Colloquy of the Two Sages, the tale of a
confrontation between the esteemed Druid Ferchertne and the recently graduated
student Nede. The tale, on its surface, is a simple story of a confrontation
sown by Bricriu between the elder and the youth after Bricriu convinces Nede,
who is returning from training over seas, to seize a rank beyond his
experience. The two Druids face off over the literal seat of contention,
engaging in a battle of words and wits to test who truly deserves to sit there.
In the end Ferchertne emerges the victor, but Nede’s graceful defense earns him
a place as Ferchertne’s student.
Reading this story establishes a pattern
of challenge and response that is useful for all modern Druids to study. Nede’s
initial actions are bold, even arrogant, as he assumes the chair of the highest
ranked Druid in the land and this can be seen as the opening challenge in the
coming confrontation. Nede does not approach Ferchertne as a humble petitioner,
but rather by declaring his own value and assuming a place as if it were
already his own. In response we see the first of Ferchertne’s challenges, not
only of words but of actions and attitude as he tests Nede’s resolve and temper
by speaking angrily and insulting Nede’s experience and knowledge. Nede passes
this challenge by responding calmly and proclaiming his own wisdom. This, then,
sets the stage for the next phase of the testing the direct question, where
Ferchertne asks Nede where he is from, what his name is, what art he practices,
what his tasks are, by what path has he come, whose son he is, and what tidings
there are. None of these are direct, literal questions, but all are allegorical
and are responded to with poetry, and each question is answered and then turned
back on the elder Druid. It is only after the final question, where each man is
asked to prophecy, that Nede concedes to Ferchertne and willingly proclaims him
the better poet and seer and kneels at Ferchertne’s feet, at which point the
older Druid asks the younger to stay on as his student. From this we can see
that the importance of the period of questioning and answering as a form of
testing, as well as the importance of the final acknowledgements of the
student’s true place.
In modern Druidism this pattern of
challenges could be used to model actual initiation rites on; it also
illustrates the vital importance of two elements within modern traditions: the
student-teacher relationship, and the hierarchy of wisdom. The traditional
Druidic model of teaching, as illustrated in this Colloquy, shows a student
petitioning to study with a teacher, studying with that person for as long as
there is knowledge to be gained there, and then moving on to find a new
teacher. This is illustrated in Nede’s studying at first with Eochaid in
Scotland and when that teacher can teach him no further he is sent back to
Ireland where the main action of the tale between Nede and Ferchertne occurs.
This is a useful model to be used today as well. The story also illustrates the
importance of understanding our individual place within the greater hierarchy
of our fellow Druids and both respecting those above us as well as teaching
those beneath us.
I, personally, found a great deal of
beauty and inspiration in this story. The question about what art they practice
gives a list of the many skills the Druids claimed including satire, blessing,
poetic inspiration, storytelling, peacemaking, and teaching wisdom. The tale
also showed me something of the proper balance of attitude that Druids were
expected to have, both proud and assertive but also respectful and quick-witted
in the face of confrontation. Nede serves as a great model to meditate on as
student who is well on the way to earning fame and a place of honor. I can hold
Nede before me as an example of how to react to a challenge and how to carry
myself with pride while still remaining respectful of those wiser than I.
On a final note the Colloquy is also a
treasure trove of cultural references and Druidic lore that anyone interested
in Druidism should take the time to study. I favor Christian Guyonvarc’h’s book
The Making of a Druid: Hidden Teachings from the Colloquy of the Two Sages because
of the detailed and extensive introduction, notes, and appendices. Being able
to study the story with the different translations and glosses included is very
useful and illuminating and offers additional insight into some of the passages.
These additions, such as the extensive discussion about the seven poetic grades,
are an important aspect to understand for both Druids and Celticists, or anyone
else interested in Irish culture.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Modern Ethics for a Modern Druid
Recently the discussion had been brought up about modern Druidic ethics and how - or even if - the concept of "harm none" fits in to a Druid's ethics. Some people feel strongly that a modern Druid should adhere to an ethical view that avoids any harm to others, although it varies between avoiding all harm and avoiding harm to other people. In contrast other people feel that modern Druids should preserve the best of the ancient Celtic views, including ethics.
My own opinion tends to agree with the second school of thought. I believe that as Druids in a modern world we are best served, and we best serve the ancient Druids memory, by learning what the ancient Druids, and to a greater degree the Celts, believed and finding the best ways to adapt that to our own time. Otherwise our ethics are not those of Celtic polytheists or Druids, but simply modern (or post modern) ethics; this is neither right nor wrong in itself, but as Druids I believe our ethics should be those of Druids.
Let's begin by looking at some of what we know of the ancient Druids and of Celtic morality. There are several examples in Irish lore that support the idea that violence was seen as being a necessity at times. From the triads of Ireland: "Three deaths that are better than life: the death of a salmon, the death of a fat pig, the death of a robber" and: "Three bloodsheds that need not be impugned: the bloodshed of battle, of jealousy, of mediating". Although the Brehon laws emphasize compensation over corporal punishment, the death penalty was a reality in Ireland. In the case of a homicide, for example, if the person refused to go before a Brehon or if he could not or would not pay the levied fine then he could lawfully be killed (Joyce, 1908). No Brehon would ever order physical punishments, as paying a fine was the standard legal punishment for any crime, but nonetheless punishments including death and blinding were common (Joyce, 1908). What this tells us is that while the Druids themselves did not advocate violence in criminal cases, it was socially acceptable for such punishments to occur. The Druids also advised kings, and this included advising military actions from cattle raids in Ireland to rebelling against Rome in Gaul; and we know as well from Tacitus's account of the destruction of Anglesey that the Druids stood against the opposing army. Juxtaposing that we also know that a Druid could stop a battle by walking between the two forces. Druids were expected to be wise enough to know when to encourage teh action and when to stop it.
In fact, rather than violence the main actions or traits that are condemned seem to be greed and lust. From the Triads of Ireland: "The three chief sins: avarice, gluttony, lust". A variety of the Brehon laws look at legislating states of marriage, sexual relations, and theft (I suggest reading Fergus Kelly's a Guide to Early Irish Law for more on this). According to Kelly's book theft could be punishable by hanging (Kelly, 1988). In some of the existing prophecies relating to the future or end of the world, such as the one given by Ferchetne in the Colloquy of Two Sages or the Morrigan's prophecy in the Cath Maige Tuired, a lot of emphasis is placed on the lack of honor, lack of modesty, false judgments, lack of truth, and a general going against the natural order of things that will occur. Similarly the Testament of Morann and the Instructions of King Cormac mac Airt emphasizes the importance of the king manifesting Truth, good judgment, generosity, and moderate behavior in order to uphold the bounty and prosperity of the land; this included being ambitious, invading neighbors, and punishing criminals. In Celtic thought there was clearly a link between correct ethics and behavior and the success or failure of life and the world itself, but those ethics, in general, seem to be directed at preserving the correct order of the world rather than improving it or idealizing it. People are not urged to abstain form alcohol or sex, or even violence, but to engage in those things in moderation and within the socially correct context; only when the actions exceed social acceptance or defy social order are there consequences.
So how do I relate this to other pagan ethics? I think Druidism in general is closer ethically to other recon faiths such as Asatru which emphasizes many of the same values. Although modern Druidry and Wicca share a common root in the friendship of Gardner and Nichols, a Druidism based more in the Celtic culture would seem to reject the modern Wiccan ethic of the Rede; although I believe there is a valid argument for the similarity in spirit of the original Rede and Drudic ethics. The original Rede, after all, was not an absolute moral law but a guideline for behavior that was open to personal choice with an understanding of consequences (I highly recommend Peter Coughlin's book Ethics and the Craft for more on this subject, or his online segments here http://www.waningmoon.com/ethics/rede.shtml). In the same way Celtic ethics appear to be based on the idea of personal responsibility and accepting the consequences of any action. However the modern Rede as it is understood by many people is seen as less flexible and more absolute and would be difficult to harmonize with my understanding of Celtic ethics. The Celts seemed to have an understanding of harm as having a place within the greater workings and balance of the world, and I have a difficult time envisioning a Druidic ethic that advocates the lack of balance inherent in a path that rejects all harm. People are expected to accept the consequences of their own actions, even if that consequence is harmful to them. The natural world is expected to endure some harm in support of human life. Even nature itself includes a balance between harm and life that is normative; natural forest fires destroy yet also clear the way for new growth, and life is often predicated on some level of harm to other living things.
How do I personally incorporate Celtic ethics into my practice of Druidism? I believe that the ultimate lessons of such ethics are Truth and moderation, and so this is what I seek in my life. Truth is an understanding of the nature of reality and of living in correct alignment with that reality; when I manifest Truth in my life then I also manifest positive qualities in the world around me. Another aspect of this is good judgment, since a person who is embracing Truth should consequently be able to correctly understand the nature of other things and reach correct judgments about them. Moderation is another key aspect, where a person should be generous without being careless, ambitious without being over-reaching, and brave without being foolish, for example. How does this relate to causing harm? Well, I see harm as sometimes necessary - there are times when a tree must be cut down for the good of the other trees, or for a need; there are times when a small pain is needed to prevent a greater one later. And there are times when violence is necessary as well. I know myself well enough to know that if my childrens' lives were threatened I would do whatever I had to in order to protect them, and knowing this I could never say that I live my life with the belief of never harming another person. I would be hypocritical to say such a thing. Although a great deal of my life is directed at preserving life and healing those who need healing, I know that sometimes we must defend ourselves. Sometimes we must bring harm, but I try to never do so without a reason. My ethic embraces harm only as it is absolutely necessary, creating a dynamic that nurtures life and healing but accepts the balance that nature requires. If I harvest a plant it is for food or another use; I have taught my children never to recklessly destroy plants for fun. When I eat meat I appreciate the sacrifice of the animal's life - truly when I eat anything I appreciate the living thing that died to feed me. And if I have to harm a person intentionally I see it as a last resort and do so only if it seems justified. This all applies equally to physical actions and to magic. I feel that this is most strongly in line with the ancient Celtic ethics and also is inline with the modern world.
To me the most important part is being able to understand if there is a need for the harm, and being able to accept the consequences of my own actions. If I cause harm then I try to follow the old Brehon law consequence of making reparations; I acknowledge what I did or my part in what happened and seek to recompense the involved or effected person. I strive to preserve harmony and balance within my understanding of Truth.
References:
Joyce, P., (1908). a Smaller Social History of Ancient Ireland. Retrieved from http://www.alia.ie/tirnanog/sochis/sochis01.html#iv
Kelly, F., (1988). a Guide to Early Irish Law
Meyers, K., (1906) the Triads of Ireland. Retrieved from http://www.ucc.ie/celt/online/T103006.html
My own opinion tends to agree with the second school of thought. I believe that as Druids in a modern world we are best served, and we best serve the ancient Druids memory, by learning what the ancient Druids, and to a greater degree the Celts, believed and finding the best ways to adapt that to our own time. Otherwise our ethics are not those of Celtic polytheists or Druids, but simply modern (or post modern) ethics; this is neither right nor wrong in itself, but as Druids I believe our ethics should be those of Druids.
Let's begin by looking at some of what we know of the ancient Druids and of Celtic morality. There are several examples in Irish lore that support the idea that violence was seen as being a necessity at times. From the triads of Ireland: "Three deaths that are better than life: the death of a salmon, the death of a fat pig, the death of a robber" and: "Three bloodsheds that need not be impugned: the bloodshed of battle, of jealousy, of mediating". Although the Brehon laws emphasize compensation over corporal punishment, the death penalty was a reality in Ireland. In the case of a homicide, for example, if the person refused to go before a Brehon or if he could not or would not pay the levied fine then he could lawfully be killed (Joyce, 1908). No Brehon would ever order physical punishments, as paying a fine was the standard legal punishment for any crime, but nonetheless punishments including death and blinding were common (Joyce, 1908). What this tells us is that while the Druids themselves did not advocate violence in criminal cases, it was socially acceptable for such punishments to occur. The Druids also advised kings, and this included advising military actions from cattle raids in Ireland to rebelling against Rome in Gaul; and we know as well from Tacitus's account of the destruction of Anglesey that the Druids stood against the opposing army. Juxtaposing that we also know that a Druid could stop a battle by walking between the two forces. Druids were expected to be wise enough to know when to encourage teh action and when to stop it.
In fact, rather than violence the main actions or traits that are condemned seem to be greed and lust. From the Triads of Ireland: "The three chief sins: avarice, gluttony, lust". A variety of the Brehon laws look at legislating states of marriage, sexual relations, and theft (I suggest reading Fergus Kelly's a Guide to Early Irish Law for more on this). According to Kelly's book theft could be punishable by hanging (Kelly, 1988). In some of the existing prophecies relating to the future or end of the world, such as the one given by Ferchetne in the Colloquy of Two Sages or the Morrigan's prophecy in the Cath Maige Tuired, a lot of emphasis is placed on the lack of honor, lack of modesty, false judgments, lack of truth, and a general going against the natural order of things that will occur. Similarly the Testament of Morann and the Instructions of King Cormac mac Airt emphasizes the importance of the king manifesting Truth, good judgment, generosity, and moderate behavior in order to uphold the bounty and prosperity of the land; this included being ambitious, invading neighbors, and punishing criminals. In Celtic thought there was clearly a link between correct ethics and behavior and the success or failure of life and the world itself, but those ethics, in general, seem to be directed at preserving the correct order of the world rather than improving it or idealizing it. People are not urged to abstain form alcohol or sex, or even violence, but to engage in those things in moderation and within the socially correct context; only when the actions exceed social acceptance or defy social order are there consequences.
So how do I relate this to other pagan ethics? I think Druidism in general is closer ethically to other recon faiths such as Asatru which emphasizes many of the same values. Although modern Druidry and Wicca share a common root in the friendship of Gardner and Nichols, a Druidism based more in the Celtic culture would seem to reject the modern Wiccan ethic of the Rede; although I believe there is a valid argument for the similarity in spirit of the original Rede and Drudic ethics. The original Rede, after all, was not an absolute moral law but a guideline for behavior that was open to personal choice with an understanding of consequences (I highly recommend Peter Coughlin's book Ethics and the Craft for more on this subject, or his online segments here http://www.waningmoon.com/ethics/rede.shtml). In the same way Celtic ethics appear to be based on the idea of personal responsibility and accepting the consequences of any action. However the modern Rede as it is understood by many people is seen as less flexible and more absolute and would be difficult to harmonize with my understanding of Celtic ethics. The Celts seemed to have an understanding of harm as having a place within the greater workings and balance of the world, and I have a difficult time envisioning a Druidic ethic that advocates the lack of balance inherent in a path that rejects all harm. People are expected to accept the consequences of their own actions, even if that consequence is harmful to them. The natural world is expected to endure some harm in support of human life. Even nature itself includes a balance between harm and life that is normative; natural forest fires destroy yet also clear the way for new growth, and life is often predicated on some level of harm to other living things.
How do I personally incorporate Celtic ethics into my practice of Druidism? I believe that the ultimate lessons of such ethics are Truth and moderation, and so this is what I seek in my life. Truth is an understanding of the nature of reality and of living in correct alignment with that reality; when I manifest Truth in my life then I also manifest positive qualities in the world around me. Another aspect of this is good judgment, since a person who is embracing Truth should consequently be able to correctly understand the nature of other things and reach correct judgments about them. Moderation is another key aspect, where a person should be generous without being careless, ambitious without being over-reaching, and brave without being foolish, for example. How does this relate to causing harm? Well, I see harm as sometimes necessary - there are times when a tree must be cut down for the good of the other trees, or for a need; there are times when a small pain is needed to prevent a greater one later. And there are times when violence is necessary as well. I know myself well enough to know that if my childrens' lives were threatened I would do whatever I had to in order to protect them, and knowing this I could never say that I live my life with the belief of never harming another person. I would be hypocritical to say such a thing. Although a great deal of my life is directed at preserving life and healing those who need healing, I know that sometimes we must defend ourselves. Sometimes we must bring harm, but I try to never do so without a reason. My ethic embraces harm only as it is absolutely necessary, creating a dynamic that nurtures life and healing but accepts the balance that nature requires. If I harvest a plant it is for food or another use; I have taught my children never to recklessly destroy plants for fun. When I eat meat I appreciate the sacrifice of the animal's life - truly when I eat anything I appreciate the living thing that died to feed me. And if I have to harm a person intentionally I see it as a last resort and do so only if it seems justified. This all applies equally to physical actions and to magic. I feel that this is most strongly in line with the ancient Celtic ethics and also is inline with the modern world.
To me the most important part is being able to understand if there is a need for the harm, and being able to accept the consequences of my own actions. If I cause harm then I try to follow the old Brehon law consequence of making reparations; I acknowledge what I did or my part in what happened and seek to recompense the involved or effected person. I strive to preserve harmony and balance within my understanding of Truth.
References:
Joyce, P., (1908). a Smaller Social History of Ancient Ireland. Retrieved from http://www.alia.ie/tirnanog/sochis/sochis01.html#iv
Kelly, F., (1988). a Guide to Early Irish Law
Meyers, K., (1906) the Triads of Ireland. Retrieved from http://www.ucc.ie/celt/online/T103006.html
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
A Modern Lughnasa Prayer
This is a version of a prayer taken from volume one of the Carmina Gadelica, modernized in language and content and made pagan. I have modefied this one more than I usually do to make it applicable to anyone in an urban or suburban setting (as opposed to the normal agricultural focus of the Gadelica). It is based on Reaping Blessing #90
A Modern Lughnasa Prayer
This morning at the first light of dawn
With the face of the sun rising in the east
I will go forth and celebrate Lughnasa
I will honor the harvest of my life
I will reflect on what I have sown
With the product of my effort around me
I will raise my eye upwards
I will turn in a sacred round
Rightway as travels the sun
From the airt of the east to the west
From the airt of the north, calmly turning,
To the very core of the airt of the south
I will give thanks to the Gods who bless me,
To the spirits that surround me,
To the ancestors who made me,
And I will make offerings to them.
A Modern Lughnasa Prayer
This morning at the first light of dawn
With the face of the sun rising in the east
I will go forth and celebrate Lughnasa
I will honor the harvest of my life
I will reflect on what I have sown
With the product of my effort around me
I will raise my eye upwards
I will turn in a sacred round
Rightway as travels the sun
From the airt of the east to the west
From the airt of the north, calmly turning,
To the very core of the airt of the south
I will give thanks to the Gods who bless me,
To the spirits that surround me,
To the ancestors who made me,
And I will make offerings to them.
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Feeling crafty - an alternative Lughnasa
 |
| The Lughnasa wreath experiment |
So it's getting close to Lughnasa again and this year I am trying something a little bit different. Usually my Lughnasa involves a family picnic and either some hiking and plant collecting or some age appropriate physical games. This year though we are facing health problems on several fronts that make an active outdoor Lughnasa much more complicated so I decided we needed a back-up plan. I noticed several people talking about Lughnasa as a time for both the traditional activity of bread baking and also of crafting, and I thought maybe this would be a good direction to go in.
I am researching how to make my own bread from scratch and plan to make some for Lughnasa. My friends have had several great suggestions about how to approach this new project and I truly appreciate all the advice I've gotten, from recipes to how to properly get the dough to rise. Also - great advice indeed - to have several trial runs before cooking for the actual holy day. I'll be sure to post after Lughnasa to let you all see how it goes.
Another inspiration I had was to try embroidery, after a good friend suggested it was an easy sowing craft to get into. I went to the store today to look for supplies and I admit I lost my nerve; the array of options was a bit too overwhelming for me without having a certain idea of what I was doing. But when I saw a set of grape wreathes I had a bit of an inspiration for a craft I have done before which can be time consuming but is easy and fun - making my own decorated wreath. I decided to pick up some basic supplies and give it a go today to see how it was and get a better plan for what to do with it on Lughnasa next week. The children wanted to make one too so we purchased a large wreath and a small one, ribbon, and assorted fake flowers. The easiest shape I know how to make on such a wreath is a basic star, so that is what we did, although I am now trying to figure out how to do a more complicated shape, perhaps a triquetra. The project was fun and not too difficult and the girls enjoyed it, so I will definitely start planning a more intricate version for the holiday.
 |
| The children's wreath |
Since I had the ribbon I also decided to decorate a blank book, as the one I have for keeping notes on my Druidic material is nearly full and needs a second volume. This is something I have done many times before and something I enjoy doing; I had never really thought of it as crafty, per se, but as I was working on it I found myself reflecting on the different ways that Lughnasa crafts can be expressed. Perhaps there is something appropriate in making decorative wreath to bless my home and a book to write about my spirituality in on a holiday associated with harvesting; certainly I found myself reflecting on the year and what I have harvested in my own life. I think next week on the actual holiday I will intentionally work this retrospective aspect into the craftwork, perhaps as a discussion with my children where we can all share our thoughts on the past few months.
 |
| The cover of the new book - the image is from a greeting card |
 |
| The inside cover of the new book - image is also a greeting card |
Saturday, July 21, 2012
Cumhacht na Teanga - or why I keep trying to learn Irish
Cumhacht na teanga means 'the power of language' in Irish Gaelic, a language I have been trying since my teens to learn. I have a limited proficiency reading it at this point and some ability to converse in writing; my accent when speaking is probably horrifying. So why, after almost 20 years, do I keep trying, keep working at it, when its obviously such a challenge?
I have many reasons, of course, for people who ask. First and foremost is that I want to speak it, fluently, and I am driven by the desire to teach my children to speak it. It's the language of my ancestors and makes me feel connected to them and to the gods I honor (as a side note of ancestral languages I also speak German, in which I was at one point fluent). I am also keenly aware of how few people still speak Irish and how easily it could go the way of Cornish and Manx, declared "dead" languages and now seeing efforts at revival. It pains me to think of Irish as a dead language, with all its beauty and lyricism reduced to history books and old songs.
Second of all it would make studying the material I study easier. In much of the scholarly writings and folklore Gaelic words are used to convey concepts or descriptions and I want to know what those words mean, not just guess from context. I also have many dual language editions of myths and I want to know how similar they are to the translations. I want to be able to read the material directly and draw my own conclusions, instead of relying on someone else's opinions.
Another driving reason is that I want to understand the culture of the Irish, and so much of culture is conveyed in language, or perhaps we could say that language is an inherent expression of culture. It shapes how we think and how we relate to the world and other people; language in many ways is a direct reflection of culture. In psychology we call this the Whorf-Sapir hypothesis. Although this hypothesis is not supported by everyone, I do believe that language shapes how we relate to the world and our culture because it is the main tool of expressing that culture and perception. Idioms are a great example of this, a way that a culture expresses unique ideas through language.
In CR and neopagan Druidism there is a continuous discussion about the need to learn a Celtic language. Many persuasive arguments are put forth over the value of langauge and of the need for those following Celtic paths to honor that path by learning the language of the culture they study. For me all of that is moot; I am driven to learn Irish by an intrinsic force, the same kind that makes me write poetry or calls me to be a polytheist. I feel as if the language is a part of who I am in some way, no matter how poorly I speak it now, and no matter how long it takes I will keep trying.
Tir gan teanga, tir gan anam.
I have many reasons, of course, for people who ask. First and foremost is that I want to speak it, fluently, and I am driven by the desire to teach my children to speak it. It's the language of my ancestors and makes me feel connected to them and to the gods I honor (as a side note of ancestral languages I also speak German, in which I was at one point fluent). I am also keenly aware of how few people still speak Irish and how easily it could go the way of Cornish and Manx, declared "dead" languages and now seeing efforts at revival. It pains me to think of Irish as a dead language, with all its beauty and lyricism reduced to history books and old songs.
Second of all it would make studying the material I study easier. In much of the scholarly writings and folklore Gaelic words are used to convey concepts or descriptions and I want to know what those words mean, not just guess from context. I also have many dual language editions of myths and I want to know how similar they are to the translations. I want to be able to read the material directly and draw my own conclusions, instead of relying on someone else's opinions.
Another driving reason is that I want to understand the culture of the Irish, and so much of culture is conveyed in language, or perhaps we could say that language is an inherent expression of culture. It shapes how we think and how we relate to the world and other people; language in many ways is a direct reflection of culture. In psychology we call this the Whorf-Sapir hypothesis. Although this hypothesis is not supported by everyone, I do believe that language shapes how we relate to the world and our culture because it is the main tool of expressing that culture and perception. Idioms are a great example of this, a way that a culture expresses unique ideas through language.
In CR and neopagan Druidism there is a continuous discussion about the need to learn a Celtic language. Many persuasive arguments are put forth over the value of langauge and of the need for those following Celtic paths to honor that path by learning the language of the culture they study. For me all of that is moot; I am driven to learn Irish by an intrinsic force, the same kind that makes me write poetry or calls me to be a polytheist. I feel as if the language is a part of who I am in some way, no matter how poorly I speak it now, and no matter how long it takes I will keep trying.
Tir gan teanga, tir gan anam.
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Book Review: Through the Faerie Glass
Yesterday I read Through the Faerie Glass by Kenny Klein, a book I had high hopes for and very much wanted to like. Unfortunately it didn't live up to my expectations. I decided to review it here to share my thoughts on it with everyone.
This book is a truly mixed bag, with good material and points side by side with bad. One of the most frustrating things when reading it is that the author often states information without any references of sources, leaving the reader unable to track down how factual something is, or what an idea is based on. His bibliography is extensive but random, with everything from the Rees's Celtic Heritage and Yeats to the Bible and modern fiction novels. It is also difficult at many points to follow what the author is saying as he will make one statement at one point and then a contradictory statement later; he goes around and around about the Fey being human folk memories of people meeting more primitive peoples, or being Gods, or being supernatural, for example, intermixing theories together and stating them each on their own. He is particularly set on the Faeries being the ancient Picts who were driven into the hills, he says, by the Celts and their iron technology, although he also says the Picts themselves may be Otherworldly, magical, shamanic, etc.,. This theory was a pet one of Gerald Gardner and featured in the novel The Mists of Avalon but there is absolutely no evidence, archaeological or folkloric, to support the idea.
Looking at the good points first the book starts with a warning against the Victorian view of faeries, and advises that the Fey are more complex and potentially dangerous than little garden sprites. The book also includes excerpts of many traditional pieces including the Ballad of True Thomas, Tam Lin, and other traditional folk songs or poems about faeries. The book also includes some good genuine folklore and belief that can often be ignored in other modern books, like the Selkies marrying human husbands or the Fey stealing children and brides.
Now intermixed within the good we see the bad. I've already mentioned his belief that the Picts were the Faeries and this becomes the crux of several problematic points. He says the words fairies and pixies are directly from the term Picts, which is just not etymologically sound. Pict is from the Latin for painted; pixie is of unknown origin, and fairy is from the Latin for fate.He states that the Irish word Sidhe means mound dweller (it means fairy hill) and is derived from the name for the Picts who lived, he claims, in underground homes. He states that iron is a good protection against faeiries (true) but he says its because the Picts would have feared the strange new metal or else associated it with death and warfare. He also claims that the reported time difference between our world and Fairyland comes from Celts who visited with the Picts and ingested psychogenic plants that distorted their sense of time, creating a false sense of being in another world; because, he says, the Picts were shamans who used psychotropic plants and apparently gave them out to untrained visitors.
Getting away from the Pictish nonsense, he also is very fond of the idea that Gods are actually fairies, a reverse of what many fairy faith and Celtic pagans believe. So instead of the gods being reduced into fairies, or put into the category of the aos sidhe, he says that the gods are fairies themselves along the lines of traditional pixies, selkies, etc., He says that Rhiannon is an underworld horse fairy. Cerridwen is a bird fairy because in her myth she turns into a bird twice, and the Sumerian/Hebrew goddess Lilith is an owl fairy. Surprisingly Llew is not a bird fairy, but a Sun God, so maybe its especially goddesses? Although he does say Odin is a fairy (and that Tyr is Odin), so, I don't know. Which sums up a lot of this book.
His section on Samhain is comic, with a very interesting discussion about how the Celts believed that Death (capital D) was wandering around on Samhain and could freely take anyone It felt like. So, he says, the Celts dressed up as ghosts to trick Death into thinking they'd already kicked it, and they placed lit turnips in front of their homes to signal that Death had already been there. Because apparently he thinks that Death leaves a glowing turnip as a "Death was here" marker; I assume so that It isn't wasting It's time going back to the same houses It's already been to. I found this extremely funny.
The author also mixes in a lot of Middle Eastern and Hebrew material with the Celtic and talks a lot about Greek Nymphs and Dryads in a Celtic context which I thought was a bit odd, but neither good nor bad. Alright the bit about Druids sleeping by streams to receive inspiration from naiads was bad, and that bit about "Cailleach bheara" being the title of the banshee when she takes the form of a deer...um, yeah, that was kind of painful.
Anyway, I wouldn't recommend it. There are good points but not nearly enough to outweigh the awful. I'm not going to bother with the second book about Fairy Tale rituals. I'm kind of surprised there is a second book, but I guess people who don't know better can't discern the quality of the material. Or they just don't care.
This book is a truly mixed bag, with good material and points side by side with bad. One of the most frustrating things when reading it is that the author often states information without any references of sources, leaving the reader unable to track down how factual something is, or what an idea is based on. His bibliography is extensive but random, with everything from the Rees's Celtic Heritage and Yeats to the Bible and modern fiction novels. It is also difficult at many points to follow what the author is saying as he will make one statement at one point and then a contradictory statement later; he goes around and around about the Fey being human folk memories of people meeting more primitive peoples, or being Gods, or being supernatural, for example, intermixing theories together and stating them each on their own. He is particularly set on the Faeries being the ancient Picts who were driven into the hills, he says, by the Celts and their iron technology, although he also says the Picts themselves may be Otherworldly, magical, shamanic, etc.,. This theory was a pet one of Gerald Gardner and featured in the novel The Mists of Avalon but there is absolutely no evidence, archaeological or folkloric, to support the idea.
Looking at the good points first the book starts with a warning against the Victorian view of faeries, and advises that the Fey are more complex and potentially dangerous than little garden sprites. The book also includes excerpts of many traditional pieces including the Ballad of True Thomas, Tam Lin, and other traditional folk songs or poems about faeries. The book also includes some good genuine folklore and belief that can often be ignored in other modern books, like the Selkies marrying human husbands or the Fey stealing children and brides.
Now intermixed within the good we see the bad. I've already mentioned his belief that the Picts were the Faeries and this becomes the crux of several problematic points. He says the words fairies and pixies are directly from the term Picts, which is just not etymologically sound. Pict is from the Latin for painted; pixie is of unknown origin, and fairy is from the Latin for fate.He states that the Irish word Sidhe means mound dweller (it means fairy hill) and is derived from the name for the Picts who lived, he claims, in underground homes. He states that iron is a good protection against faeiries (true) but he says its because the Picts would have feared the strange new metal or else associated it with death and warfare. He also claims that the reported time difference between our world and Fairyland comes from Celts who visited with the Picts and ingested psychogenic plants that distorted their sense of time, creating a false sense of being in another world; because, he says, the Picts were shamans who used psychotropic plants and apparently gave them out to untrained visitors.
Getting away from the Pictish nonsense, he also is very fond of the idea that Gods are actually fairies, a reverse of what many fairy faith and Celtic pagans believe. So instead of the gods being reduced into fairies, or put into the category of the aos sidhe, he says that the gods are fairies themselves along the lines of traditional pixies, selkies, etc., He says that Rhiannon is an underworld horse fairy. Cerridwen is a bird fairy because in her myth she turns into a bird twice, and the Sumerian/Hebrew goddess Lilith is an owl fairy. Surprisingly Llew is not a bird fairy, but a Sun God, so maybe its especially goddesses? Although he does say Odin is a fairy (and that Tyr is Odin), so, I don't know. Which sums up a lot of this book.
His section on Samhain is comic, with a very interesting discussion about how the Celts believed that Death (capital D) was wandering around on Samhain and could freely take anyone It felt like. So, he says, the Celts dressed up as ghosts to trick Death into thinking they'd already kicked it, and they placed lit turnips in front of their homes to signal that Death had already been there. Because apparently he thinks that Death leaves a glowing turnip as a "Death was here" marker; I assume so that It isn't wasting It's time going back to the same houses It's already been to. I found this extremely funny.
The author also mixes in a lot of Middle Eastern and Hebrew material with the Celtic and talks a lot about Greek Nymphs and Dryads in a Celtic context which I thought was a bit odd, but neither good nor bad. Alright the bit about Druids sleeping by streams to receive inspiration from naiads was bad, and that bit about "Cailleach bheara" being the title of the banshee when she takes the form of a deer...um, yeah, that was kind of painful.
Anyway, I wouldn't recommend it. There are good points but not nearly enough to outweigh the awful. I'm not going to bother with the second book about Fairy Tale rituals. I'm kind of surprised there is a second book, but I guess people who don't know better can't discern the quality of the material. Or they just don't care.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Random Spritual Update...
I promise to get back to my regular style of blogging soon - I have ideas to blog about the Colloquy of Two Sages, Manannan mac Lir, Brighid, maybe Badhbh, wands, and some other assorted fun things - but I wanted to keep everyone who has been following my rambling spiritual quest up to date. So, here is a random update.
This past week has been turbulent on several fronts. I found out a very dear friend who has just started chemo again is in the hospital with complications, and I am very worried about her. My youngest daughter, who has chronic medical issues, cut her foot at the beach and now we are infection watch. Personally, I have been fighting repeated migraines as I try to switch from one medication to another and also found out that I am anemic. It has been one of those weeks were everyday seemed to bring more and more challenges.
I always try to find some good in everything, and if nothing else this past week has helped me to better understand my own need for spiritual fulfillment and, more importantly, what I need in a religion. I have missed the daily routine of my CR Druidic practices and when I have been at my lowest I have sought comfort in the natural world and in the spirits I feel closest too: Macha, my father, my great-grandmother, the spirits of the land and the spirits of certain plants. It's an interesting mix, to be sure. I also had time to really reflect on the ways that Wicca does and doesn't work for me, and I think I've accepted now that, while it will always hold happy memories for me, its just not right for me. From a purely intellectual perspective modern Druidism, specifically ADF, makes the most sense and would allow to me to incorporate my diverse interests and pantheons. Of course I've been a card carrying member of ADF since 2001 and have never done anything with it, having been drawn immediately into more specifically Celtic approaches, but I have decided that the next logical step in this self exploration is to give a fair shot to neopagan Druidism.
I may find out that, in the end, I will be walking alone on my own path that is a blend of what I like best from all the religions I have experienced. But over time I have forgotten or lost the little bits of joy in each of them, and I am determined now to reclaim them - already I have valuable lessons from Wicca to bring forward, things that I enjoy or make me happy but that I stopped doing because they didn't fit into a new approach. It's time to see what Druidism holds for me.
This past week has been turbulent on several fronts. I found out a very dear friend who has just started chemo again is in the hospital with complications, and I am very worried about her. My youngest daughter, who has chronic medical issues, cut her foot at the beach and now we are infection watch. Personally, I have been fighting repeated migraines as I try to switch from one medication to another and also found out that I am anemic. It has been one of those weeks were everyday seemed to bring more and more challenges.
I always try to find some good in everything, and if nothing else this past week has helped me to better understand my own need for spiritual fulfillment and, more importantly, what I need in a religion. I have missed the daily routine of my CR Druidic practices and when I have been at my lowest I have sought comfort in the natural world and in the spirits I feel closest too: Macha, my father, my great-grandmother, the spirits of the land and the spirits of certain plants. It's an interesting mix, to be sure. I also had time to really reflect on the ways that Wicca does and doesn't work for me, and I think I've accepted now that, while it will always hold happy memories for me, its just not right for me. From a purely intellectual perspective modern Druidism, specifically ADF, makes the most sense and would allow to me to incorporate my diverse interests and pantheons. Of course I've been a card carrying member of ADF since 2001 and have never done anything with it, having been drawn immediately into more specifically Celtic approaches, but I have decided that the next logical step in this self exploration is to give a fair shot to neopagan Druidism.
I may find out that, in the end, I will be walking alone on my own path that is a blend of what I like best from all the religions I have experienced. But over time I have forgotten or lost the little bits of joy in each of them, and I am determined now to reclaim them - already I have valuable lessons from Wicca to bring forward, things that I enjoy or make me happy but that I stopped doing because they didn't fit into a new approach. It's time to see what Druidism holds for me.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
Dark Night of the Soul, part 2
So its been about a month since I decided to re-assess my spiritual framework and chose to, basically, discard everything and start over at the beginning in order to find what really works for me. It was harder than I expected to let go of decades of built up practice, but there was also something oddly cathartic about it. It's been an interesting experience so far, filled with insight and frustration.
Part of why I made this decision was that I didn't feel happy with my religious practice anymore, feeling rather that it had become a series of empty actions. I felt that in some areas of religious practice, especially heathen, I had developed a neurotic fear of doing it wrong that was interfering with my ability to genuinely connect to the Powers I was worshipping. I also was feeling a lot of frustration with my communities, for a variety of reasons, that made me feel like an outsider. Whether this was reality or my own perception it created a feeling of alienation. The combination made me feel very inadequate and made ritual something I dreaded instead of looked forward to. So I stopped all the religious practices (although not the devotional or magical practices) and went back to where I began.
There have been many frustrating aspects of this experience so far, one of which was realizing that some things can't be regained once they are outgrown. Can I really be an eclectic Wiccan? Honestly, I don't know. Wicca is a specific religion with its own cosmology, theology, and rituals. They are beautiful, fulfilling beliefs and in some ways they do overlap with my own but I had to revisit that to see the ways they don't fit. I have been a polytheist for too long to embrace a view of deity as aspects of a single power. Although my own view is in itself a bit vague (is Odin also Wotan? Is Lugh, Llew? etc.,) trying to view deity as a single being that emanates as two gendered beings, that in turn manifest as a multitude of deities has been very difficult. I am just too used to the individual personalities to revert to this other view. I have struggled with the ceremony and detail of Wiccan ritual, which is so much more involved and time-consuming than heathen or CR approaches.
Now it's true that, in most ways, you can't go back. I'm not an 11 year old anymore and I can't recapture the innocent belief and uncritical wonder I felt back then. However going back helped me to remember some of the simple things that meant a lot to me but where lost along the way. I love singing during ritual for example and I like a religion that not only allows but normally includes magical practice, something that is lacking in heathenry and CR. I also like the sense of freedom and inclusiveness of eclectic Wicca. On the other hand the past month has also made me realize that I like heathenry's emphasis on community and personal responsibility, as well as CR's emphasis on research and facts. It is also clear to me that my gods are *my* gods, and even with the freedom to wander I chose to stick with the Powers I've built up connections to over the years.
Probably the biggest thing I've realized so far is that certain things are key aspects of my own practice. The faeries/vaettir and ancestors are pivotal to my system of belief and ritual in a way that transcends any individual religious practice. The gods I worship are who they are, specific individual deities that I am devoted to or otherwise have built relationships with. In the same way whether I call it seidhr, cunning craft, hedgecraft or witchcraft - the actual practice of folk magic - is a cornerstone of what I do. I am a religious witch, and my pagan faith is inseparable, for me, from my magical practice. Perhaps that is why I struggled so much to feel comfortable in faiths that acknowledge a lesser role for magic or see it as separate (and not always equal). I am not a good heathen because most heathens see magic as superfluous, while to me it is essential. I am not a good CR because most CR's see magic as incidental or cerebral, while to me it is a visceral thing like breathing. And perhaps I am not a good Wiccan because I delve into things that most Wiccans seem to avoid (coughhexingcough) and I struggle with the cosmology. Ironic that I can reconcile Norse and Irish cosmology, but struggle with Wiccan views...
I miss heathenry. I miss the feeling of camaraderie, the simple approach to worship, the stability of the belief system. The cohesiveness. I may, eventually, after giving this current attempt more time, go back to Gaelic Heathenry or otherwise look at ways to comfortably incorporate what works for me and what I miss into one path....or I may find with more time that this current effort begins to gel better and feel less...artificial. I am still working through so many echos of past practice that adjusting is harder than I expected, and I want to give this a totally fair shot so that if I choose to walk away again I will know that I did so because it really wasn't working and not because I didn't try.
So after a month where does this leave me? Still questioning and still working out what is important to me and what is artificial window dressing added in to please the public....and still making magic.
Part of why I made this decision was that I didn't feel happy with my religious practice anymore, feeling rather that it had become a series of empty actions. I felt that in some areas of religious practice, especially heathen, I had developed a neurotic fear of doing it wrong that was interfering with my ability to genuinely connect to the Powers I was worshipping. I also was feeling a lot of frustration with my communities, for a variety of reasons, that made me feel like an outsider. Whether this was reality or my own perception it created a feeling of alienation. The combination made me feel very inadequate and made ritual something I dreaded instead of looked forward to. So I stopped all the religious practices (although not the devotional or magical practices) and went back to where I began.
There have been many frustrating aspects of this experience so far, one of which was realizing that some things can't be regained once they are outgrown. Can I really be an eclectic Wiccan? Honestly, I don't know. Wicca is a specific religion with its own cosmology, theology, and rituals. They are beautiful, fulfilling beliefs and in some ways they do overlap with my own but I had to revisit that to see the ways they don't fit. I have been a polytheist for too long to embrace a view of deity as aspects of a single power. Although my own view is in itself a bit vague (is Odin also Wotan? Is Lugh, Llew? etc.,) trying to view deity as a single being that emanates as two gendered beings, that in turn manifest as a multitude of deities has been very difficult. I am just too used to the individual personalities to revert to this other view. I have struggled with the ceremony and detail of Wiccan ritual, which is so much more involved and time-consuming than heathen or CR approaches.
Now it's true that, in most ways, you can't go back. I'm not an 11 year old anymore and I can't recapture the innocent belief and uncritical wonder I felt back then. However going back helped me to remember some of the simple things that meant a lot to me but where lost along the way. I love singing during ritual for example and I like a religion that not only allows but normally includes magical practice, something that is lacking in heathenry and CR. I also like the sense of freedom and inclusiveness of eclectic Wicca. On the other hand the past month has also made me realize that I like heathenry's emphasis on community and personal responsibility, as well as CR's emphasis on research and facts. It is also clear to me that my gods are *my* gods, and even with the freedom to wander I chose to stick with the Powers I've built up connections to over the years.
Probably the biggest thing I've realized so far is that certain things are key aspects of my own practice. The faeries/vaettir and ancestors are pivotal to my system of belief and ritual in a way that transcends any individual religious practice. The gods I worship are who they are, specific individual deities that I am devoted to or otherwise have built relationships with. In the same way whether I call it seidhr, cunning craft, hedgecraft or witchcraft - the actual practice of folk magic - is a cornerstone of what I do. I am a religious witch, and my pagan faith is inseparable, for me, from my magical practice. Perhaps that is why I struggled so much to feel comfortable in faiths that acknowledge a lesser role for magic or see it as separate (and not always equal). I am not a good heathen because most heathens see magic as superfluous, while to me it is essential. I am not a good CR because most CR's see magic as incidental or cerebral, while to me it is a visceral thing like breathing. And perhaps I am not a good Wiccan because I delve into things that most Wiccans seem to avoid (coughhexingcough) and I struggle with the cosmology. Ironic that I can reconcile Norse and Irish cosmology, but struggle with Wiccan views...
I miss heathenry. I miss the feeling of camaraderie, the simple approach to worship, the stability of the belief system. The cohesiveness. I may, eventually, after giving this current attempt more time, go back to Gaelic Heathenry or otherwise look at ways to comfortably incorporate what works for me and what I miss into one path....or I may find with more time that this current effort begins to gel better and feel less...artificial. I am still working through so many echos of past practice that adjusting is harder than I expected, and I want to give this a totally fair shot so that if I choose to walk away again I will know that I did so because it really wasn't working and not because I didn't try.
So after a month where does this leave me? Still questioning and still working out what is important to me and what is artificial window dressing added in to please the public....and still making magic.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)